


Noticing

by MrsNea



Category: Captain America (Comics), Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:42:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 32,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23330341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsNea/pseuds/MrsNea
Summary: Y/N is in love with Steve, but she is afraid to tell him. So she tries to show him by using Cheesy Pickup lines. Will he ever notice her?
Relationships: Steve Rogers & Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader, Steve Rogers/ Reader, Tony Stark/Pepper Potts
Comments: 65
Kudos: 78





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> There will be some angst, mentions of death, self-doubt and drunk persons in this.

It had all started innocently enough, you had been in love with Steve since you joined the Avengers, but between Steve finding Bucky, Civil War and the Snap, there hadn’t been a time you could go up to Steve and confess your feelings for him. Then when it all was finally over and the entire team was back at the Avengers Compound, you just could not come up with anything to say. Every time you started to say something to Steve you just froze or got interrupted by someone or something. It was killing you. You had tried flirting, but it was as if Steve did not notice. So when you tried to tell Steve at the stroke of midnight on Tony’s New Years Party and Steve was called away on a mission with Bucky. You were slowly giving up. After drinking a couple of glasses of champagnes and avoiding every hopeful guy who wanted to start the year by kissing an Avenger you ended up in a couch feeling miserable, but after the fifth guy came with a silly pick up line, you decided that next year would be different. You would show Steve how you felt, and if Steve did not like you back you would just have to get over him, but you gave yourself one year. Just one more year or else it was time to move on. You could not spend so many more years being hung up on one guy. You deserved to be happy and maybe you could find someone to share your life with.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Steve came back on the second of January, you started on your plan to show Steve your love for him. One morning you made him and the team breakfast in the morning. He walked into the kitchen after his run.  
“What is this, Sweetheart?” he asks and looks at the pancakes, scrambled eggs and sausages you were cooking.   
“I thought that you could need a proper breakfast after your mission,” you smile up at him.   
“Thank you, Sweetheart,” Steve leaned over and gave your forehead a kiss. You sigh. Your lips were right there. One after one the team comes into the kitchen and you have a nice family breakfast. Nobody was away on missions. It was nice. Every now and then you would look over at Steve, but his attention was never on you. He was talking to Sam and Bucky, laughing and having a good time. It made you smile. Nat gave your shoulder a nudge and you looked over at you. She raised her eyebrows at you and looked between Steve and you. You blushed and looked down at your plate. She nudged you again and you looked up. Now both Wanda and Nat were looking at you with big smiles.   
You sigh because you know that they had caught on to your feelings for Steve. 

After breakfast was over Nat and Wanda cornered you in the gym.  
“So, you like Steve,” Nat smirks and Wanda snickers behind her hand. You knew that it was no use in denying it.  
“No, I don’t like Steve. I am in love with him.” You say and meet Nat’s eyes. Her eyes widened for a short while.   
“How long has this been going on?” Nat wondered looking at Wanda. You smile. Finally, something that Nat had not noticed.  
“Since I joined the Avengers,” you look down at the floor. It has been a lot of years with you literally following Steve like a puppy in love. Wanda and Nat share a look that you can’t place.  
“I think you should go for it,” Wanda urges you.   
“Yes, you really should” Nat agrees. “Steve likes you a lot.”  
“You are imagining things,” you shake your head, feeling down over Steve and your feelings. “I am pretty sure I would know if he liked me. I mean, I have been by his side for years now. And the only woman I saw him be interested in is Sharon. And let’s face it, I am no Sharon.” You are looking down at your body. Nat and Wanda start to object but you lift a finger to keep them quiet. “Steve only sees me as a friend, maybe not even that. I might just be a teammate.”  
“You don’t kiss your teammate on the forehead and you don’t cuddle a teammate on the couch,” Nat argues. You just shrug your shoulders. Maybe you should just try and move on from Steve now.   
“I still think you should go for it,” Wanda places a hand on your shoulder.   
“Me too,” Nat places a hand on your other shoulder. “Go up to him and tell him how you fell.”  
“I have tried that. We always get interrupted,” you sigh. “Maybe I should just try and move on.”  
“No, not yet,” Nat looks at Wanda. “We can help you make a grand gesture.”  
“No, I will not make an ass out of myself in front of the leader of this team,” You tense up. “And in the process lose the only family I have, by being too ashamed to stay here.”  
Nat and Wanda fall silent. Then Nat smiles.  
“Then don’t do that. Be obvious by flirting with him,” Nat says and before you can argue that you tried that. “Do it with pick-up lines, not just normal flirting.” Wanda’s eyes start to sparkle.   
“That is a great idea. I bet he will pick up on it quickly if you use the real cheesy pick-up lines,” Wanda pulls out her phone and googles pick-up lines. “Like this one: ‘Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you.’” You all start laughing. It was so bad that it was good.   
“That could work,” you agree. If not it was a way for you to “tell” Steve how you were feeling. “But I promised myself on New Year’s Eve that I would just give this one year. If nothing changes by then.. Well, then I’m done. I don’t want to spend my life waiting for him to notice me or reject me. Or worse, fall in love with someone right in front of my eyes.” Wanda nods at your admission and Nat narrows her eyes.   
“I bet that won’t be a problem,” Nat says and looks like the Cheshire cat. “Steve is smart, he will probably understand what you mean by the pick-up lines before too long.” You let out a laugh.   
“We will see,” you are still laughing.   
“Why not start right now,” Wanda says and pushes your arm. Steve and Bucky walk into the gym. They head over to the sandbags and the three of you look on with appreciation on the super-soldiers training. They made it look so easy and effortless, something that could not be said for you when you trained. After a while, Nat pushes you forward. Clearly, the girls wanted you to start right away so you walk over to Bucky and Steve.   
“Hey, guys,” you smile at them when you are closer. Bucky and Steve stop training to look at you. They greet you and Bucky takes a sip from his water bottle.   
“You have an awesome form,” you wink at Steve and looks him up and down. Bucky chokes on his water and Nat pat his back. You had not noticed that Wanda and Nat had followed you. Bucky is looking at you with big eyes. The girls are grinning big.  
“Thank you, Sweetheart,” Steve replies and continues hitting the sandbag. Bucky just stands there frozen. Nat pushes his arm and he looks around the room. You wink at Bucky and tell the guys you will see them later. When you leave the gym with the girls you end up laughing in the hallway.   
“Even if Steve doesn’t understand what I am doing,” you get out while you are laughing. “It is totally worth it to see Bucky’s face.” Wanda and Nat agree.   
“Well, I need a shower and then I got pick-up lines to google,” You say and leave the girls alone. 

“How can Steve be so clueless?” Wanda asks Nat when both of them are watching Y/N walk away.   
“It is not just him that is clueless,” Nat smirks and nods in the direction that Y/N had disappeared. “She is just as clueless to Steve’s loving gazes at her. And the fact that he doesn’t use the nickname doll on here but every other loving nickname that he never uses on anyone else,” Nat says and Wanda moods.  
“How long until we should interfere?” Wanda wonders when they walked towards their rooms.  
“I want to wait as long as possible,” Nat looks around. “There is a chance that the two of them actually will notice each other’s feelings without us meddling. We will just have to wait and see what this year that Y/N has set as a kind of deadline to see what happens.” They break apart and walk to their rooms. All Nat knew was that things would get really interesting in the compound.


	2. Hot coffee, Dreams and Treadmill (January)

A couple of days later you walk into the kitchen early in the morning. You had slept badly and all you wanted was some coffee. Well, actually what you wanted was to go back to bed, but you had a meeting with Fury in one hour and you needed to be awake for that. Steve was standing by the counter reading a newspaper. You smiled at the sight before you. Steve knew how to read the news on his phone, but he still prefered reading the news on actual papers. You walk over and pour yourself some coffee. The aroma hits your nose and it makes you smile. You take a sip at the same time as Steve turned around and looked at you. The coffee was hot and burnt your tongue, and you close your eyes a short while, trying not to swear.  
“Sweetheart, what is wrong?” Steve takes a step towards you.   
“My coffee is really hot. But you’re hotter.” You smile at him over the rim of your cup. Steve turns a bit red before he starts laughing. Before you can say another word, Bucky and Sam walk into the kitchen and they are arguing. As usual.   
“What are you arguing about now?” you ask and tilt your head to the side. Bucky lets out a deep breath.  
“We are not arguing. We are having a discussion,” Bucky says and takes your cup away from you and takes a sip.   
“Hey, that is my coffee,” you pout. Steve shakes his head and pours you another cup that he gives you.   
“Thank you, Steve. You are the best,” You stand on your toes and give him a kiss on the cheek before sending Bucky an angry look. Then you leave the room. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

On Martin Luther King Jr. Day you find Steve sitting on the couch reading a book about him. You have been flirting with him every day, but so far he has not caught on. You hum for yourself before you walk over to him and sit down beside him. He looks up from the book and gives you a big smile before he continues to read. You cuddle up close to him and start reading the book as well. Steve puts his arm around your shoulder and you move even closer to him. You have already read the book so you close your eyes and enjoy the closeness to the man you love. His heat and the sound of his heartbeats soon lull you to sleep.   
“Sweetheart, you have been sleeping for two hours,” Steve was carefully waking you by caressing your cheek. You slowly open your eyes and meet his blue eyes. He is smiling at you and you can feel your heart beat faster.  
“I have a dream..” you smile up at Steve. “About you and me together, in my bed.” You wink at him and he blushes a bit.  
“You just want someone to keep you warm when you sleep,” Steve wink back at you. You stand up and turn around so you are facing him again.   
“Not just anybody,” you say and press a kiss to Steve’s cheek. “Only you.” And with those words, you leave the room. You walk past Bucky whose eyebrows are raised as high as they can. You smile at him, but don’t say a word. You knew that he had heard you flirting with Steve. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It is two days left of January and you walked into the gym to train with Nat and you saw that Bucky, Steve and Sam were working out together. This gave you an idea for another pick-up line to use on Steve if you got the chance. Nat and you placed your water bottle next to what you knew would be the men’s water bottles. You nodded against the treadmills, Nat shrugged her shoulders so you went over there. You put in your headphones and start walking fast on the treadmill, then you increase the speed every few minutes until you are running. After thirty minutes running you decrease the speed and hop off. Steve and Sam were standing drinking water, so you walked over there under the pretence that you needed water. You greeted each other and you took a big sip of water.   
“Getting warmed up before your sparring?” Steve asked and nodded against the treadmill you just stepped off. You smiled at him.  
“The treadmill is not the only thing in here that gets my heart rate up,” you look him up and down taking in his impressive physics, then you wink at him. Steve blushes and Sam chokes on his water and Steve gives him a few dunks in his back. This makes you giggle and you leave them to walk over to Nat again. She raises her brow at you and you just shrug. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~


	3. Valentines Day and Mission accident (February)

It was Valentine’s Day and you were feeling kind of blue. You wish you had someone special in your life. Someone to spend the day with. Your friends all had someone, well, Bucky and Steve were single as far as you knew, but you had not dared to ask Steve how he was spending Valentine’s day. What if he had a date? That would have killed you. Bucky, Steve and Sam had been away on a mission since the start of the month, but you knew they had come back the night before. It was early in the morning and you were pretty sure that nobody was awake yet. You walked over to your desk and pulled out the card and small gift you had gotten for Steve. How you wished that you had the guts to hand it to him, but there was too much on the line. You needed this family. Steve was not the kind of person who would be cruel if he turned you down, but you did not know if you could take it.  
You opened the door into the hallway and looked around. You did not see anybody so you crept down the hallway to Steve’s door and there you lay your Valentine’s Day gift for him. When you turned around you saw Nat standing there with a big smirk on her face. Of course, you thought. You put your hand to your lips and walked back to your room. 

A couple of hours later you walked into the kitchen. Wanda was making waffles for breakfast and the whole team was gathered for it. It was her valentines day gift for the team. She had a big goofy smile on her face and when you looked at Sam, he had the same expression. It was nice to see your friend so happy. Steve walks in with blood-red roses. You feel your heart starting to bet faster. Who were the roses for? He walks over to you and hands you a rose.  
“Happy Valentine’s day, Sweetheart,” he smiles at you. You thank him and then he does the same for the entire team, even the boys. It makes your heart plummet. You were like anyone else in the team. Maybe you should stop this hoping and try and get over your feelings for Steve. You were pretty sure that Fury could give you a long mission if you asked him. Someone undercover and away from Steve, until you could get a grip over your feelings. Nat looks at you and she must see your mood because she gives you an encouraging smile. Steve comes around and sits down next to you. He gives you a big happy smile and you can’t help but return the smile. Wanda serves the waffles and everyone is enjoying them and having a nice time. You smile and look around on your family. This was the best Valentines Day you had ever had. 

Steve walked over to Bucky after breakfast.  
“Thank you for the artbook,” Steve smiled at Bucky. “I a grateful that you thought about me today.” Bucky looks at him strangely.  
“I did not give you anything,” Bucky tilts his head to the side. “Wasn’t there a note?”  
“No, that was why I thought it was you,” Steve admitted and scratched his neck. “You know for every year I been without a Valentine.”  
“Looks like you have a secret admired,” Bucky commented. “Let’s go to the gym and work of Wanda’s waffles. Steve nodded absentminded and wondered who could have given him the book. Probably Sam or Tony who wanted to mess with him, is what Steve comes up with. Either way, Steve appreciated the gift and intended to read it soon.

The day goes by fast and in the evening you heard your friends go out on their respective dates and you looked down on yourself. You were dressed for the movie night you were planning to have alone, that meant your short comfortable hot pink shorts, a black tank top with the Disney Castle and the text ‘You don’t like Disney? You Need to bibbity bobbity back the fuck out of my life‘ and a pair of fluffy socks. You did not want to watch romantic movies or a Disney movie, no, you planned on watching horror movies. Anything from you thinking about Steve out with some lucky woman. When you can’t hear any more people around you open the door and walk out in the hallway.  
“F.R.I.D.A.Y., can you play my ‘Guilty Pleasure Playlist’?” you smile to yourself. You were going to make the best out of being alone.  
“Of course, Y/N,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. answered and ‘Your Body Is a Wonderland’ with John Mayer started to play. You danced your way to the kitchen singing along with the song, feeling a lot better now.  
Still dancing you open the refrigerator and pull out the wine you put in earlier in the day. You take it out and twirl around dancing. You continue to dance to the counter and get down a wine glass for you. The Chorus comes on and you sing loud “Your body is a wonderland, Your body is a wonder (I’ll use my hands), Your body is a wonderland.” You put the glass beside the bottle and twirl around. Leaning against the end of the counter was Steve, dressed in a pair of sweats and a tight t-shirt. He had a big smirk on his face and you feel your face heat up.  
“What are you doing?” He asks tilting his face to the side.  
“I am singing about your body,” you say quickly. Steve starts laughing. You turn your back to him to gain your bearings again. You had not meant for that to come out.  
“What are you doing home?” he asks when he stopped laughing. You shrug your shoulders.  
“Y/N,” Steve squints his eyes at you. Not wanting to tell him that you had turned down a couple of men when they had asked you out, you pointed to the glass of wine.  
“I am having a quiet evening with a glass of wine, some popcorn and a couple of movies,” you say and start getting the popcorn ready. “What are you doing home?”  
“Almost the same as you,” Steve answered, but was holding up a book. It was one you had recommended to him, which made you smile. You did not dare to ask him why he did not have a date. “But since you are watching movies, can I join?”  
“Of course,” you get out. Hopefully not too excited or too indifferent.  
“What are we watching?” he asks and walks over to the fridge to get a beer out.  
“Whatever you want,” you say, not really feeling up to watching horror movies anymore.  
“I still have a lot of Disney movies on my list,” Steve takes out his phone and so you can see what he has left. It turns out he had not been watching any movies without you. “Why don’t you choose?”  
“Hmm,” you sound and start thinking about what you want to see. “This is hard.” Steve smiles at you. “Whatever you choose, will be great.”  
You decide to watch Hercules to start with. Steve seems to think that is a good idea as well.  
You are sitting on the couch together, kind of close. Steve seems to like the movie and you turn to him. He looks at you.  
“I’m sorry I didn’t get you a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day, but if you want something sweet, I’m right here,” you smile at Steve and he smiles at you.  
“Cute,” Steve says and presses a kiss to your forehead. You sigh as he turns his attention back to the popcorn and the movie. Well, at least you get to spend Valentine’s day with him, even if it was just as a friend. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

At the end of February, the team was on a mission to take down a Hydra base. Nat and you were inside the facility getting information from the computers, while the rest of the team was scattered around fighting Hydra agents. The information was important though it was thought to have the location of more Hydra facilities. Nat and you found the computers and went to work. You inserted the USB-drive that Tony had done to extract all the information from the computers before wiping them. Nat swore under breath and you knew that you would not be alone in the room for long. So you stood up ready for a fight. In came six Hydra agents. Nat took the three on the right and you took the three on the left. You both shot two each at the same time and they fell down on the floor. Your third one shot at you but missed. Your fist connected with his face and you brought your gun out to shoot him when there was a hit to your head from behind. How had you missed the agent? Your vision became blurry, but still, you keep fighting. You shot the agent in front of you and turned around to take care of the agent behind you only to find a knife to his chest. You looked at Nat and she smiled.  
“Thank you,” you said and sat down in front of the computers and saw that the USB-Drive was finished, so you pulled it out.  
“Nat, we are good,” you say and hold up the drive. You put it in the secure pocket in your catsuit and stand up. There is blackness around the edges of your vision and you swear. The hit to your head had been worse than you thought. You run a hand through your hair and feel something sticky at the back of your head. When you pull your hand out of your hair and look at it you see blood. That was not a good sign.  
“Y/N,” Nat says at the same time as Steve runs into the room. You take a step forward and everything turns black. 

You wake up and are staring into those blue, blue eyes that you love, but the eyes were not happy and sparkling. They looked serious. You want to make Steve smile so your first thought in your scrambled brain is to flirt with him.  
“I must have crossed eyes because I can only focus on you,” you beam up at Steve before you make a grimace of pain.  
“I think you might have a concussion,” Steve said and lifted you up.  
“You know, my legs work,” you pointed out. Steve just shook his head.  
“Not taking any chances,” Steve mutters.  
“Y/N, you fainted,” Nat says, taking two guns from Bucky. When did Bucky come into the room? You snort.  
“We got your back,” Bucky says as Steve leaves the room. Your mind is not quite grasping what is happening around you and you feel the blackness trying to overtake you again.  
“Steve,” you mumble and Steve looks down at you as he keeps hurrying out of the Hydra base against the Quinjet.  
“Y/N, you need to stay awake,” Steve hurries on his steps even more.  
“I am sorry,” you mumble and the blackness overtakes you again. 

Steve feels Y/N get limp in his arms and he is scared.  
“Bucky, Nat,” he says and looks at his friends. Together they run to the Quinjet. Nat and Bucky are looking around them so they did not miss any Hydra agents. Sam was flying overhead doing the same. When they come to the Quinjet, Steve lays Y/N down and starts pacing. Nat walks over to him and puts a hand on his arm.  
“She will be alright. Bruce is looking at her now,” she says softly to him. Steve nodded. Of course, she is going to be alright.  
“Steve,” he hears Y/N voice say and he turns around. She is sitting up and Bruce is doing something with the back of her head. He walks over to her and sits down next to her.  
“Hey,” he says. She smiles at him and takes her hand. They sit there together not talking.  
“You have a wound in the back of your head,” Bruce say and Steve sees the blood on his fingers. “I will tape it up and then Dr Cho can stitch it up when we get back to the compound.” Y/N nods and looks down on her hands. Steve knew she did not like needles.  
“I will be with you the entire time,” Steve Said and kissed her forehead. It made you relax.


	4. Lucky Charms and Muggles (March)

It was the morning of Saint Patrick’s Day and you took out the carton of Lucky Charms. A tradition you had started for yourself a couple of years ago. On Saint Patrick’s Day you ate Lucky Charms and wore green. Tony usually made fun of you for it, but you said it was to honour your Irish Roots. You had finally been cleared to go back on missions after the last mission. You had a bad concussion and needed to sew four stitches in the back of your head. Steve had been by your side the entire time and he had stayed up with you when you came back to the compound because the doctors did not want you to sleep. You had tried flirting with him, but the pain in your head had been too much for it to be any good. But since a couple of days ago you started flirting with him again. It felt good to make him laugh even if it meant that he did not take you seriously when you flirted with him.   
Steve walked into the kitchen, when he saw you he sent you a big smile and said good morning. You said good morning and he sat down next to you with a cup of coffee.   
“Lucky Charms?” Steve nodded to your bowl.   
“Yes, it’s Saint Patrick’s day,” you smile at him and he chuckles.   
“How could I have missed that?” Steve looks at your green outfit. You laugh at him and eat your cereal. After a few moments of silence, you look over at Steve. You had just remembered a pick-up line you read online a few days before.   
“Is it weird to say that you remind me of Lucky Charms?” you tilt your head to your side.   
“Why would you say that?” Steve’s brows are connected.  
“Because you’re magically delicious,” you wink and stand up. Steve blushes and looks down on the countertop. You give him a kiss on the cheek, put the bowl in the dishwasher and leave the room. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that day almost the whole team had watched the Saint Patrick’s Day parade. Everyone but Nat and Bucky is wearing something green. You had painted your left cheek with a four-leaf clover. Now you were all drinking and being merry. Steve is sitting next to you and you were all laughing at something Sam had said. You were drinking a pint of Guinness, while some of the team members were drinking a green cocktail that you had mixed just for this occasion. You were starting to get a bit tipsy, but it was Saint Patrick’s Day and you were free. No missions for you for two days. A deal you had made with Fury when you joined the team, that you were free for Saint Patrick’s day if the earth was not ending. You think about the pick-up line you had looked up for the day and smile at Steve. You lean in close and whisper in his ear.  
“I may not have four leaves, but if you kiss me, I’ll bring you luck!” You pull back and look at him. Steve laughs and presses a kiss to your cheek.   
“So now I am lucky?” Steve asks and you just nod. You look away and see Nat smirking at you. That had not gone as planned and you felt more than just a little bit tipsy. You walked over to the window and looked out. Nat walked over to you.   
“I think I would have gone with: ‘Don’t worry about looking for four-leaf clovers. I’m all you need to get lucky tonight.’” she whispered in your ear and you blushed.   
“I would not dare,” you admitted. “That is a bit too much even for me.” Nat nodded and left you to your own thoughts. You needed to come up with more pick-up lines to use on Steve, but first, you needed to sober up. You bid the team good night and went to your room to sleep it off. You did not see Steve’s eyes following you as you left the room. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You could still not believe that neither Bucky, Steve or Nat had watched the Harry Potter movies. When that came to light earlier in the week both Peter and you had insisted that that had to be fixed, so you had decided to have a Harry Potter Movie Marathon. Your Goal was to make them watch all the movies, but if you could get the team together to watch the two first movies together today and then watch the other two at a time some other day.   
You sat down on one of the couches and were happy when Steve sat down next to you. Then Bucky sat down on the other side of you and suddenly it felt cramped in the couch. You looked over at Bucky and saw that he took a lot more place than he usually did.   
“Bucky, could you please move a bit to the side?” you ask and he looks at you. He has a mischief gleam to his eye.  
“Nope,” he popped the p. You huffed and glared at him, but then Steve put his arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer to him. You cuddled into Steve’s side and ignored Bucky. He was not going to ruin movie night for you.   
Tony started the movie and you almost squeal. You loved the Harry Potter movies, even if you loved the books more.   
After the first movie was finished Tony declared it to be a ten minutes break to stretch your legs. You moved away from Steve’s side and stretched your arms up in the air. Steve stood up and you got a good look of his ass.  
“Steve, are you sure you’re a muggle?” you asked and he turned around looking at you,  
“Why?” he asked and you saw Nat listen closely to what you were saying.  
“Because I’d swear that ass is magical,” You winked at Steve and stood up. He blushed and looked down at the floor. Nat beamed at you and Bucky, who you had forgotten, still sat on the couch and looked quite uncomfortable. You walked into the kitchen to get a bottle of water. Taking a sip from the bottle you started to think of more pick-up lines to use on Steve. You had a lot of Harry Potter ones to use and you wanted to use as many as you could. Steve and Bucky came into the kitchen and when Steve saw you he smiled at you but got a bit red in the face. Bucky pushed his arm and Steve walked over to you. You thought this is it. He has finally noticed my feelings. But he walks to the fridge and takes out two bottles of water and you feel your hope gets crushed. They leave you alone in the kitchen and you take a few deep breaths before you walk back to the coach. Steve is already sitting where you sat before so you sit down next him. He put his arms around your shoulder and pulls you close directly. Then he places a blanket over the both of you. You smile up at him.  
“Thank you, Steve,” you cuddle into his side.   
“You are welcome,” Steve says and looks down at you. Just as you think he will say something. Bucky sits down on your other side again and breaks the moment. Just as Tony starts the next movie you lean closer to Steve.  
“If I were to look into the Mirror of Erised, I’d see the two of us together,” you whisper in Steve’s ear and then you settled into his side again to watch the movie. You could feel his eyes on you from time to time during the movie, but you ignored it. You probably gave him something to think about. When the movie was over everyone was ready to go to bed. Even though you easily could have seen another movie, you agreed with going to bed. You stood up and stretched, Nat nodded at you and you turned around and saw Steve eyeing your ass. It made you smile and you said your good night to everyone and left to go to bed. You heard steps behind you and you hoped it would be Steve, but it was Bucky.  
“I know you are up to something,” Bucky said as he fell into step with you.  
“I have no idea what you are talking about,” you say to Bucky and shrug your shoulders.   
“Just know I am watching you,” Bucky points a finger at you. You laugh and stop at your door.   
“Oh, I am shaking in my boots,” You say and open your door. Steve was standing a bit down in the corridor. You smile at him and then you close your door in Bucky’s face before he can say anything else. A laugh is bubbling inside you the entire time you get ready for bed. Maybe this will be even more fun than you believe.


	5. Sleepyhead and Fluffy Bunny Ears (April)

It was April and you had continued to flirt with Steve every day. Or at least every day that you met him, the only place you did not flirt with him was on missions. You needed to keep your head in the game then. Nat and you had just come back to the compound after a two weeks mission in Spain. It had been both a tiring and an informative mission. All you wanted to do was to sleep in your own bed for the next 24 hours. Nat and you parted ways in the hallway. It was late night and you thought the rest of the team would be asleep by now. When you came to your door you saw Steve walking against you in the hallway. His eyes lit up when he saw you and you gave him a small smile.  
“Hey,” Steve says and you drop your bag on the floor and give him a hug. He laughs and hugs you back. “You must be dead on your feet.” You just nod into his chest. He laughs again and opens the door to your room.   
“Come on, Sweetheart,” Steve turns you around, picks up your bag from the floor and leads you into your room. “Let’s get you to bed.”  
“Are you going to join me?” You yawned and Steve chuckled.   
“I don’t think so sleepyhead,” he said and put down your bag by the end of your bed. You turned around to him.  
“If you are not going to undress me or tuck me in,” you winked at him. “Then I think it’s time for you to leave.” You said and got your shoes off. Then you started to pull down the zipper on your jacket. Steve who finally understood what you were doing blushed, mumbled good night and left your room.   
“If only I had the energy,” you mumbled and got undressed. Then you lay down in bed and fell asleep before you had any other thoughts. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next morning, way too early, you are awakened by the pounding on your door.   
“Auntie Y/N,” Morgan was knocking on your door. You looked at your clock on your bedside table and groan. It was not even eight o’clock in the morning. You had gotten home about four in the morning. You loved Morgan, but right now you wanted her to go away. The door opened, but you did not have the energy to even lift your head. Footsteps were heard coming closer to the bed.  
“Auntie Y/N,” you heard Morgans’s voice whisper.   
“Morgan,” Steve was in the doorway. “Auntie Y/N, got home really late last night. She needs to sleep a couple of hours more. Come with me.”  
“But it’s Easter,” Morgan whined. “She promised to paint eggs with me.”   
“She can do that when she has gotten some more sleep,” Steve says and you hear Steve walking into the room. Morgan giggles and you hear the door close. Steve had lifted Morgan out of your room.   
“No disruptions, please FRIDAY, until at least noon,” you get out and FRIDAY agrees. And you immediately fall asleep.

At eleven you wake up and are hungry. You are still tired, but food seemed to be a better idea than to continue sleeping. After getting a shower and dressing you leave your room to go to the kitchen to get some food.  
“Oh, look, she is alive,” Sam smirks when you walk into the kitchen. You ignore him and walk to the fridge to see if there is any food. In there is a container with an avocado salad with your name on it, clearly written by Steve. You smile and take it along with a bottle of water.   
“Aw, did he make you lunch?” Nat smirks when she comes into the kitchen. You nod to the fridge.  
“He did one for you too,” You start eating and almost moan it was so good. Nat nodded and walked over to the fridge. A moan escaped your mouth when you continued to eat.  
“Do you want to be left alone with that salad?” Sam grin at you.  
“Oh, shut up,” you glare at him. “Nat and I have been living on kind of spars food on our mission. So I think I have the right to enjoy good food.” Sam laughs at you and you huff at him.  
“Maybe I should tell Steve that his cooking made you moan,” Nat winks at you. It made your face turn red and Sam laugh even more. You continue to eat under silence and kept how good the food was to yourself. 

When you had finished eating you took care of the dishes. Steve walks into the kitchen.  
“Thank you for the salad,” you stand on your toes and press a kiss to Steve’s cheek.  
“Yeah, man, she really enjoyed it,” Sam is wearing a shit-eating grin. Nat tries to hide her laugh in her hand, but you heard her. You blush and leave the kitchen.  
“What was that about?” you hear Steve ask and hurries on your steps. Hoping that Sam and Nat keep their mouths shut. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next day in the afternoon everyone was outside looking for eggs. Tony had forgotten to hide the eggs during the night so you, Wanda and Pepper had spent a couple of hours hiding eggs, while the men had kept Morgan occupied inside. Now you stood looking around on Morgan, Clint, Tony, Sam and Bucky looking for eggs. It was kind of amusing. You saw Steve standing to the side so you walked over to him. He was wearing a pair of blue fluffy bunny-ears on a headband. It was clear that Steve couldn’t say no to Morgan any more than you could.   
“Are you the Easter Bunny?” You smiled at him and he chuckled.  
“Because of the ears, right?” Steve pointed on the ears.  
“No, ‘Cause you’ve been hoppin’ around my mind all day,” You say and Steve just blinks at you. It makes you laugh.  
“Auntie Y/N,” Morgan yells at you. She holds up a pink egg and makes a little dance. “Auntie Y/N, come help me.” You walk over to her. Leaving Steve alone with his thoughts. Bucky falls into step with you.  
“So what pick-up line did you use?” he asks and you look at him.   
“What?” you say and blush a bit.  
“Oh, did you use: ‘Hey. You know the phrase ‘screwing like rabbits’? I think you and I can do better, want to try?’” Bucky winks at you and your face gets red.  
“What?! No!” you almost yell out. Bucky just chuckles and you hurry up your pace so you are with Morgan, and safe from Bucky’s ideas of a pick-up line. You would never be able to say something like that to Steve. Never.  
“What did Uncle Bucky say?” Morgan tilted her head to the side.   
“Nothing important, Sweetie,” you answer. “Now let’s find some more eggs.” Morgan dances a bit on the spot and off you go. 

Later that evening you are wearing a pair of fluffy hot pink bunny ears. Morgan had insisted that everyone had a pair of ears, and nobody had the heart to say no to her. Tony had a red pair, Pepper a dark blue pair, Nat had white pair, Sam had a pair of neon green once, Wanda had light pink, Clint had a pair of purple once, Bucky had a pair of dark red once, Peter had grey once and Bruce had a pair that was green. All you could think was that if the press saw this, they would have a field day. The headlines would write themself. Morgan was wearing a pair of hot pink bunny ears as well and painted on a pink nose and whiskers. Steve, Pepper and Wanda also had a pink nose and whiskers. It looked kind of funny on Steve with his beard, but you knew he had a soft spot for Morgan. Tony and Morgan had decided that you all should have an Easter movie night. First movie out was Hop and then Rise of the Guardians. You sat down on the couch and Morgan sat down next to you and clapped on the other side of you.   
“Steve, sit here with Y/N,” Morgan demanded. Steve did as she said and sat down next to you. You smiled at him and felt kind of awkward. Did Morgan know about your feelings for Steve? Tony started the movie and you had a problem with relaxing. Morgan cuddled into your side, but you did almost not dare to touch Steve. He pushed loosely on your arm and you looked at him. He gave you a big smile and put his arm around your shoulder. It made you relax and you started paying attention to the movie. Morgan talked in the movie and asked questions, but that was nothing new. You had watched movies with her before. 

When the movies where over Morgan was tired and Tony came to lift her to bed. She turned to Steve and giggled.  
“Uncle Steven, you look like a bunny with a beard,” She said and smiled brightly at him. Tony said goodnight to everyone and carried Morgan to bed. Pepper followed him. Steve turned to you.  
“Some bunny I am, right?” Steve pointed at his beard.   
“You’re not just somebunny,” you gave Steve a hug. “You’re my bunny.” You stood up and said goodnight to everybody and went to your room to sleep.

Steve looked after Y/N and shook his head. Nat and Bucky were watching Steve closely, but his head was somewhere else so he did not notice. Bucky nodded to the kitchen and Nat followed him.  
“Y/N has feelings for Steve. That is why she is flirting with him, isn’t it?” Bucky fixed his eyes on Nat and she just shrugged.   
“Come on, Nat, I know you know,” Bucky was not letting up.  
“What is it to you?” Nat crossed her arms.   
“Let’s make a bet,” Bucky smirked, Nat tilted her head. “How long it takes for Steve to understand what Y/N is up to.” Nat looked smug.  
“Fine, but just so you know,” Nat lowered her voice. “Y/N has given herself a deadline. Until next year, then she will give up.”   
“Steve might be a Punk, but he is not that slow,” Bucky sounded confident. “I say that Steve will figure it out in July.” Nat nodded.  
“I think he will figure it out in October. What should we bet?” She looked around the kitchen for ideas.  
“How about if losers have to do the winners laundry for a month,” Bucky smirks at Nat.  
“Fine,” She says and holds her hand out to Bucky. They hear a thud from above them and Clint comes into the room from the vents.  
“I want in on that bet,” He says. “I think Steve will figure it out in September.” They all agree and go their separate ways. All of them sure that they have the right month.


	6. Caffeine, remembering and speechless (May)

It’s the middle of May and You were drinking your fifth cup of coffee for the day. All to stay awake and do the paperwork that you were behind on. The last month had been full of missions, after missions. The longest you’ve been home between missions has been two and a half day. You had been sleeping poorly for a couple of nights now. Nightmares were plaguing you and all you wanted to do was take a nap, but you knew that you needed to turn the papers in. 

You were sitting at the counter in the kitchen because you knew that if you did them in your room you would just fall asleep. And now you were almost finished. Just one last report to write and then you could hand it in to Steve. You wear concentration on the papers in front of you and even though it sometimes seemed like the words were jumping around on the paper, you were going to get it done. Steve walked into the room, but you did not notice. You took a sip from your mug and saw someone in your peripheral view.  
“Hey, Steve,” You said without looking at him. He created you back and walked over to you.  
“Still working on those reports?” he asked looking over your shoulder.   
“Yes, I know I am behind,” you wrote the last line and then you were finished. “But I am done now.” You turned around and beamed at him. That was when you noticed he was only wearing a pair of low hanging Basketball shorts.   
“I’m going to start watching my caffeine intake, because Honey, you make my heart palpitate,” You looked him over. He was sweaty and glistering, but you did not mind.   
“I think what you really need is to sleep,” Steve crossed his arms and looked down at you. You sigh.   
“I know, I just hated being behind on all the paperwork,” you looked down on the floor.   
“Sweetheart, I know how many missions you have been on the last month,” Steve put his hand under your chin and lifted it carefully. “You don’t need to worry about paperwork. You had a reason to be behind.”   
“Well, now I am finished,” you nodded towards all the papers on the counter.   
“I will take care of this. Now go get some sleep.” You nodded and he pressed a kiss to your forehead. It made everything in your head go mushy, so you left the room. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It’s Memorial Day and an important day for three of the most important people in your life. Steve, Sam and Bucky all took the day very seriously, not more than the rest of you by any means, but they been soldiers at war and knew the sacrifices that the soldiers had made for their country. Tony had arranged for the Avengers to attend a memorial service where the Howling Commandos were going to be mentioned. You and Tony had made sure that Bucky would be honoured as well. Tony’s relationship with Bucky might still not be the best, but he knew that nothing that had happened was Bucky’s fault. He was a POW and he deserved so much more respect and love than he ever got. You had not told Steve about the work Tony and you had put into getting all of this together because you wanted it to be a surprise and you really did not want to take any of the glory for it. This day was for all the soldiers that had or were fighting for this country. 

The ceremony was soon to start and Bucky started to feel uncomfortable. All the Avengers were standing in the back, to give chairs to all the veterans that were there that needed to sit. Bucky was changing his stans looking around on all the people.  
“I should not be here,” Bucky mumbled and started to walk away.  
“Bucky,” you walked after him and took a hold of his hand. “This is exactly where you should be. You were a POW. Nothing you did was your choice, and anybody that had a problem with you being here has to deal with me.” You pulled him back to the rest of the Avengers and Steve gave you a small smile and mouthed ‘Thank you’. You smiled back and made sure that Bucky and you stood between Sam and Steve. 

The ceremony started and when it came to the part where they started to talk about the Howling Commandos you saw tears in both Steve and Bucky’s eyes. Tony seemed to be affected as well, and you know that the Howling Commandos had been an important part of Peggy’s life as well. You had also made sure, without Tony’s knowledge, that they would mention Peggy in the memorial service. They mention Peggy and Steve took your hand and held it tight. You saw Tony take a hold of Pepper and it made you glad that you begged them to include Peggy.   
Then came the moment you had waited on.  
“And lastly we want to give special honour to one man, that is not deceased, but that has gotten a lot of negative press and a lot of hate, but that has been wrongly put on him.” You moved to let Steve stand next to Bucky, but Bucky took a hold of your hand. “I am talking about a man that was the longest POW in the world’s history, Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. Even when the whole world had turned on him, he still put his life on the line to save everyone and he needs to get the recognition he deserves. Not as Captain America’s best friend, but as the hero he is. A man that served under World War II and a man that fought against Thanos.” Bucky was crying and you realised Steve’s hand and put your left arm around Bucky and gave him your right hand to hold on to.  
“Now I ask you all to stand for the 21 gun salute for all the soldiers that we remember this day, as well as Sergeant James Barnes.” They waited a while so that all the Veterans could get to their feet before the salute started. Steve, Sam and Bucky raise their hand to salute during the gun salute and you feel tears building up in your eyes thinking about all the soldiers that had lost their lives fighting for their country. 

An hour after the ceremony the team are still talking to old veterans and their familys. You see Steve standing a bit to the side looking a bit lost.   
“Hey,” you say when you walk up to him.  
“Hey, Sweetheart,” Steve smiles at you. “I can still not believe you did that for Bucky and Peggy.”   
“How did you know it was me?” you ask and look down on the ground.   
“Tony,” Steve says and you look over at him. He winks at you.   
“Well, I got help,” you nod to Tony’s direction.   
“He said you were the driving force,” Steve takes your hand and you look up at him,  
“Bucky deserves to get the recognition for what he has done,” You shrug your shoulders. Deciding to change the subject you try to come up with a pick-up line.   
“I am pretty sure you looked really nice in your uniform back in the day,” you wink at Steve.  
“After the serum, you mean,” Steve looked at the ground. Fuck that went wrong. It sounded better in your head than when it came out.  
“No, Steve,” You said and lifted his head with your hand. “Just for the record. I would have loved to date you before the serum.”  
“You would have dated a small man that had asthma?” Steve sounded sceptical.   
“If that man was you?” you smiled at him. “Without a doubt.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek and went over to Bucky. He looked relaxed and was talking to a couple of Veterans. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the 29th of May and a birthday party for Tony, the man that loved parties. Pepper had been planning it since New Year and it was a big, big party. Nat, Wanda and Pepper had dragged you out a couple of days ago to buy dresses for the party. Tony had insisted that everyone needed new clothes. Morgan had been hurt that she had not been allowed to go with him, but Tony had explained that the grown-up woman needed some alone bonding time. That had not worked, but Pepper promised her a shopping day another day and that had worked. The dress they had forced you to buy was far too expensive, but they had insisted saying that Tony was paying and that you looked beautiful in the dress.

Now when you were dressed, with your make-up and hair done, you had to admit that the dress was perfect for you. The burgundy colour made your skin look like it was glowing, the model of the dress showed the best features of your body, without being overly revealing. You twirled around once in front of the mirror to build up your confidence. Then you went over what kind of pick-up lines you could use on Steve tonight just so you had a couple ready. When you walked out in the hallway, Nat and Wanda were not waiting on you like they had said. Instead, Steve was standing with his back to you a bit away from your door. When you closed the door, Steve turned around and started to walk against you. He was dressed in a black suit and a white button-down shirt, with a black bowtie. He had a big smile on his face, and you almost forgot how to breathe.   
“I was going to say something really sweet about you but when I saw you I was speechless.” is all that you can get out. He looked so handsome and gorgeous that it was as your brain was frozen.  
“Well, I don’t know what to say either,” Steve’s eyes were big as he took you in. He held out his hand for you so you placed it in his. What he did then surprised you. He bowed down and kissed the back of your hand.   
“You look absolutely breathtaking,” Steve almost whispered out and you smiled at him.  
“And you look really handsome,” You blushed with his eyes on you.   
“Shall we join the party?” Steve asked and tucked your hand under his arm. You nodded and together you walked into the party. A lot of women were looking at you kind of angry, which did not surprise you. Walking in with Steve like this made it look like you were a couple and even if it was what you wanted more than anything, you knew that he was not your boyfriend. He was your friend and it would not surprise you if a lot of ladies asked him to dance during the evening.   
But to your surprise, Steve kept close to you the entire evening and you even got a couple of dances in. You danced also danced with Tony, Sam, Bucky and Clint. And Steve only danced with Nat, Wanda, Pepper and Morgan and you. Other women asked him, of course, but he always turned them down politely. If you were near they would send you dagger looks and walk away. Bucky whispered, when one particular woman would not give up on trying to get Steve to dance with her, ‘you would be dead if those looks could kill.’ It made you laugh. Steve looked over at you and Bucky and it was clear that he had heard what Bucky had whispered to you. He winked at you and it made you laugh more. 

Tony and Pepper walked over to Bucky, Nat and Clint.  
“We want in on the bet,” Tony said to them. Bucky looked at Nat and smirked.  
“How do you know about the bet?” she asked and crossed her arms.  
“My dear Natasha,” Tony looked smug. “Do you really think I don’t know what is going on around here?”  
“Fine,” Nat said and looked around.   
“What month do you think Steve will open his eyes?” Clint asked.   
“I think November,” Pepper smiled and looked over at her husband.  
“Well, I bet Steve is a bit more perceptive than that and I think August,” Tony smirked. 

You looked around the party and smiled. Most people had left as it was well after midnight, but all the Avengers were still left. Steve stood talking to Wanda. He had a relaxed smile on his face and it made butterflies swirl around your stomach. You wished you had the guts to tell him how you really felt, but you just couldn’t. At least not yet. Maybe when the year was up. Right now you were just going to enjoy being his friend and have fun while you flirted with him. You saw Nat, Clint, Bucky, Tony and Pepper stand together looking like they were up to something, but all thoughts you had about that disappeared as Steve came over to you.  
“You know,” You tilt your head and bite your bottom lip. “You look like you belong on the cover of a magazine.” Steve blushed a bit and looked down on the floor. You did not know what to say to him, but then Steve looked up at you. He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, when the woman from earlier, that did not take Steve turning down her question to dance that good, came up to the two of you. She was drunk and pointed at Steve.   
“Are you an elevator?” She slurred out and Steve looked at you with big helpless eyes.   
“Because I would love to go up and down on you.” She tried to wink at him but she closed both her eyes. You tried not to laugh at what was happening in front of you. The women did not give up there or even seem to notice Steve’s panic expression.   
“My name is Kelsey. Remember that, because you will be screaming it later,” The woman moves closer to Steve and places her hand on his chest.   
“I am so sorry, ma’am,” Steve swallows and looks kind of scared. “But I am not interested.” Kaley plasters herself on Steve and smiles up at him.  
“Don’t play hard to get, baby. I know you can’t be into someone like her,” Kaley looks over at you with hate in her eyes.  
Steve untangles himself from the woman.  
“Listen, I am not interesting.” Steve’s voice is cold. “And for the record, Y/N is a beautiful woman and I would damn lucky if she was mine. She is a woman with class, kindness and always makes me laugh.” Kelsey turns to you. Just as she is about to open her mouth another woman hurries over.  
“Kelsey, come on,” the woman says. “What are you doing? Let’s go home.”   
Pepper came over and helped the women get Kelsey away from there. You look at Steve and start laughing, after a while he starts laughing along with you.   
“Well, that was interesting,” You say and wipe the tears out of your eyes. Steve nods and smiles at you.  
“I am going to bed now,” You give him a hug and say good night to the rest of the team.   
When you are in your room you lay down on your bed and think about what Steve had said. It was as it was going around like a loop in your head. He called you beautiful. It filled you with hope and maybe more confidence to continue flirting with him. Maybe Steve actually had feelings for you. With those thoughts in your head, you fall asleep, still in your dress and make-up.


	7. Grey skies, Patronus and peptalk (June)

The morning after Tony’s party Steve, Bucky and Sam had been called away on a mission. You had hoped to get some clarity in what Steve had meant with what he had said, but when you had gotten out of your dress and washed off the make-up he had already left. That was two weeks ago now. You had been away on a couple of missions during the time, but it had been nothing but training and being home for the last few days. Today was a grey and rainy day so after training, you had retreated to the window seat in the library reading one of your favourite books for probably the hundredth time. After an hour you started to feel sleepy so you closed your eyes for a short while. You fell asleep instantly and was woken up an hour later when someone was carefully nudging you awake.  
“Sweetheart,” you heard Steve’s voice. You thought it was a dream because if you were honest with yourself you had dreamed about Steve almost every night for the last two weeks. But when you opened your eyes you looked up in Steve’s blue eyes.   
“No wonder the sky is grey today,” you mumbled.  
“Why?” Steve asked and you smiled.  
“All the blue is in your eyes,” you answered before you pressed a kiss to his cheek. Steve started to laugh.  
“I have missed you, Sweetheart,” he said and gave you a hug. You hugged him back close.   
“I missed you too,” you said against his neck. Steve realised you and looked down on your book.  
“Are you reading that book again?” he grinned at you.  
“Hey, it’s one of my favourites,” you crossed your arms,  
“Maybe it’s time that I read it,” Steve lifted the book and read the back of the cover.   
“I think it is,” you smiled at him and he nodded. “In fact, you can take it now.” Steve smiled and took the book. It was first then you noticed that he was still in his stealth suit.   
“When did you get back?” you asked and stood up.   
“About ten minutes ago,” Steve scratched the back of his neck.   
“Go take a shower and get some sleep,” you ordered him. “Then we can catch up.” Steve nodded and gave you one last hug before he left the library. You looked after him because well, that ass in that suit was something worth looking at. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was time for another Harry Potter movie night. This time Tony had decided that you should look at three movies. You were almost giddy. When you came into the room every place was taken, except the place next to Steve, well between Steve and Bucky again. Bucky had a shit-eating grin on again and Steve patted the seat between them. You took your blanket and walked over to them. The blanket was the reason you were last. You had been cold all day and you figured that you wanted to be cosy during the movie. Steve smiled at you when you sat down between the two soldiers. Bucky made it so that it once again was cramped in the couch. Steve put his arm around you and pulled you close to him. So once again you cuddled up next to him. Tony started the movie and you could see that some of your team members were looking at Steve and you during the first movie. When you had watched the first movie for the night, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Tony declared a 10 minutes break. You looked upon Steve and knew exactly which Harry Potter themed Pick up line you would use. Steve looked down on you and that was when you said it.  
“If I were to produce a Protanus,” you bit your lower lip before you continued. “You’d be my happy thought.” Steve laughed and you looked around to see that Tony, Pepper, Nat, Clint and Bucky were looking at you. It was kind of awkward so you stood up and left the room. After going to the bathroom to splash some water in your face you went to the kitchen to get a water bottle. Nat and Wanda come in.   
“What is going on?” you ask and Nat lifts an eyebrow.  
“What do you mean?” Wanda tilts her head to the side.  
“I feel like any moment that I am near Steve, then half the team is looking at me,” you admit and look down at the floor. “Maybe I should just stop with this flirting with Steve. Try and get over him.”  
“NO!” Nat almost yells. She was not usually a person that yelled. “I mean, don’t do that,” Nat said and looked at Wanda.  
“I am so sure that Steve likes you too,” Wanda says and puts an arm over your shoulder. “Don’t give up yet.” You look at Nat and there is something with her.  
“Okay, not yet,” You agree and together you leave the kitchen. Steve was waiting already on the couch and when you came into the room he held up your blanket so you could get under it again. He also drapes part of the blanket over himself.  
“Is this okay?” he asks and nods to the blanket.  
“Yes,” you say and cuddle into his side as he places his arm around your shoulders. Tony starts the next move which is Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. You smile as the movie starts, ignoring that once again some of the members of the team are watching you. You look up and see that Steve is completely concentrated on the movie. 

The movie night ends when you had finished watching Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Three Harry Potter movies on one night were just your kind of night. Everyone was tired and wanted to go to bed. But you needed to know what Steve though. You are almost jumping on the spot, but in the end, you can’t hold it in.  
“So, what did you think?” you look up at Steve. He laughs and the butterflies in your stomach make somersaults. His laugh must be one of the best sounds in the world.  
“I loved the movies,” Steve admits and your smile even brighter. “I like a world where there are dragons, unicorns and witches.” You dance around on the spot.  
“I knew it,” you giggle and throw your arms up. Steve puts his arm around your shoulder and together you walk towards your rooms. Outside Steve’s door, you stop and talk for a bit. And when Steve looks down on you and smiles, you knew that you just had to say one last pick-up line for the night.  
“Your smile is like Expelliarmus. Simple, but disarming,” you wink and with that, you leave him standing outside his door. You hear him chuckle before he goes into his room. You are tired so you yawn and go to bed the minute you get into your room. That night you dream about Steve and you surrounded by dragons and unicorns. It makes you smile. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A couple of days later you walked into the gym and Steve was hitting a punching bag. There was something with him that just felt off. Bucky tried to talk to him, and even though you did not hear what Steve said you understood that it was not something nice. Bucky lifted his hands and walked away. He walked up to you.  
“Hey, I would give Steve some space today,” Buck said and rubbed a hand over his forehead. You nodded and went over to the treadmill to start your training. Just because Steve was having a bad day, did not mean that you would not get your training in. You put your headphones in your ears and started to run. It was only you and Steve in the room. You heard when Steve breaks the punching bag, but you ignored it and continued to run. If Steve wanted to talk he knew where you were. After a while, Steve’s beating continued and you knew that he had changed the punching bag. After running 20 minutes you walked off the treadmill to lift some weights. You walked over to your water bottle and Steve came over to you.  
“Hey,” you said and smiled at him.   
“Hey, Sweetheart,” Steve responded and took a sip from his water bottle. He looked beat, but you did not really know what to say. You bit your bottom lip.  
“Steve, is something wrong?” you asked and he turned his whole body towards you. It was as he was trying to figure out what to say. “It is clear that something is not okay.” You said and placed a hand on his arm. He sighs and sits down.  
“I just..” he started and you smiled encouragingly to him. “I just feel like a fake.”  
“How?” you asked and tilted your head to the side.   
“Like I am not supposed to be here,” Steve said and tilted his head down. He was looking down on his taped hands. “Like they chose the wrong man to be Captain America.” You almost laugh but managed to hold it in. You sit down in front of him on the floor.  
“Steve, look at me,” you say and he listens. “You were not the wrong man. You were just the right man. You are still the right man. I don’t know much about the science behind the serum, but I know that enough to know that the serum increases all the traits in the man that gets them.” Steve’s attention is all on you and you place a hand on his cheek.  
“Steve, you were already an amazing man before the serum. You were the kind of man that the world would have been proud to have as a hero and now all of that is just amplified.” Neither of you notices Bucky and Sam standing in the opening to the gym.  
“Before the serum, you were kind, cute, hot, honest, a good man and a fantastic friend. The list was long. After the serum everything about you is super. Now you are a super soldier that is also super strong, super kind, super cute, super honest, a super good man and a super fantastic friend. The list is equally long. And anyone who knows you knows what a fantastic and amazing man you are. We are lucky to have you as our leader.” Steve smiled at her.   
“Come on,” you said and stood up and handed him your hand. “Let’s sparr and get you out of this funk.” Steve stood up and pulled you into a hug.   
“Thank you, Sweetheart,” Steve said into your head. “I needed to hear that.”  
“I was just saying the truth,” You say and smile. Together you walked over to the mats. 

In the door to the gym were Sam and Bucky. The latter had a big grin on his face.  
“I want in on the bet,” was all Sam had to say to the scene he just witnessed.   
“When do you think?” Bucky wondered. Sam looked over to the mats where Y/N was sparring with Steve.  
“If he did not get her feelings from that peptalk then I think this is pretty much screwed,” Sam sighed. “So I have to say the end of December when it’s almost too late.” Bucky understood what Sam was saying. Let’s hope Steve sees what is right in front of him before then. They watched the two of them train for a while before they left them alone, not that Y/N or Steve had noticed them. They had been too occupied with each other.


	8. Planning, trickery and an unexpected mission (July)

It was the beginning of July and you had been sneaking around with the team, keeping the plans for Steve’s 106 birthday as secret as possible. You had come with the suggestion a couple of months ago that maybe the team could go away for 4th of July and therefore Steve’s birthday. Somewhere away from all the people and celebrate Steve more privately. The team had agreed that Steve deserved to have a day to relax. Tony offered up one of his more secluded mansions for a mini-vacation slash birthday bash. You had gotten Pepper involved so that she could keep Tony’s extravaganza tendencies in check. If someone could do that, it would be Pepper. Steve had no idea, or at least you hoped that was the case. Peter Parker was not informed about the plans, because he was not good at keeping secrets. How he kept his superhero identity a secret was a wonder to you. Bucky was keeping Steve occupied while you, Wanda, Sam and Morgan were planning for the party. Morgan insisted on there being fireworks, red, blue and white, and you had a hard time telling her no.   
“Then when the fireworks show is you and uncle Steve can kiss, auntie Y/N,” Morgan smiled at you. That comment made you stop writing the list of supplies you needed to buy.  
“What?” you could feel your face turning red and you saw Wanda and Sam trying to suppress their laughs.  
“You know, kiss,” Morgan smushed up her face.   
“Morgan, where have you gotten an idea like that?” you tried to take a couple of deep breaths.  
“Dad said that Uncle Steve and you are to blind to see how much in love the two of you with each other. He said that he wonders if he will need to look the two of you in the elevator together and only let you out when the two of you..” Morgan looks up at you with big eyes. “Then he said a bad word.” Sam and Wanda start laughing. They could apparently not hold it in anymore.   
“Morgan did your father say this to you?” you narrow your eyes.  
“No, I overheard him talking to Uncle Rhodey,” Morgan admits and you look at Sam and Wanda who is still laughing.  
“You really should tell your mother what you heard your father say,” you smile at Morgan. Pepper would not like it that Tony was learning Morgan bad words.   
“What should I tell her Daddy said?” Morgan tilted her head.  
“The bad word,” You smile at her.  
“So not that you and uncle Steve love each other?” Morgan smiles at you and you want to groan.  
“Sweetie, Your mother already knows that,” Sam gets out before he starts laughing again.  
“And Morgan,” Wanda is smiling brightly, so you know she is up to something. “It’s New Year’s Eve that usually kisses during fireworks.” Morgan nods looking serious. You groan, like that would not get ideas into Morgan’s head. Hopefully, she would have forgotten all about this before New Year’s Eve. The subject is dropped and you continue planning Steve’s birthday party. Hopefully, Morgan would keep her father’s opinions to herself in the future, at least when it was about Steve and you. 

Sam, Wanda and you were getting back from buying party supplies for Steve’s party. When you step into the compound you see Steve in the hallway. You curse Bucky under your breath. His job was to keep Steve occupied and away from the compound.   
“We need to distract, Steve, quick,” Sam whispers and nods out in the hallway that Steve was in. If he saw you no the surprise would be destroyed.   
“Y/N, you need to go distract him,” Wanda pushed you.  
“Me?!” you look at them.   
“Yes, I can’t keep a straight face right now,” Wanda said and she pushed you out into the hallway.   
“Hey, Sweetheart,” Steve says when he sees you. “Where is everyone?”  
“Hmm… I don’t know,” you bit your lower lip. You saw that Steve was carrying one of his sketchbooks. “Have you sketched something new?” Steve nods and you smile.  
“Can I please see?” you ask and Steve opens the sketchbook. You take the book and Steve stands beside you. This gives Sam and Wanda an opportunity to start carrying the bags to Wanda’s room. The first sketch is of Pepper and Morgan walking hand in hand outside. It was as if they would walk out of the paper. The next one is of Bruce and Tony talking close together and laughing. It looked so alive. Then there was a picture of Sam and Bucky bickering. It made you laugh. When you went to turn the page again, Steve tried to take the sketchbook away from you, but you managed to keep it and you turned the page. The next picture is of you laughing and looking beautiful, more beautiful than you had ever seen me. Steve was fidgeting.   
“Steve these are amazing,” you smile up at him.   
“You think so?” he asks and you nod. You flip through the sketchbook. There are more sketches of the team and you count to four more of you. It made your body feel warm and kind of like you were floating. He looked at you. He sketched you.   
“You are so amazing that your birthday should be a national holiday. Oh wait it is!” you wink at Steve and he laughs loud with his head thrown back. You see Sam and Wanda give you thumbs up behind Steve’s back and you know they had gotten all the supplies to Wanda’s room. Steve was still laughing and it was the best sound in the world. Even if he did not seem to understand that you were flirting, seeing him laugh was the best part of your day. You told him that you had something to do when he had stopped laughing. You hand the sketchbook back to Steve and go to find Sam and Wanda. There was more planning to do, and even though Steve had seemed kind of disappointed that you could not spend time with him, you knew that it was for his sake. Trying to give him a fantastic birthday.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the day before Steve’s birthday and it was time for the plan to get Steve to the mansion. The plan was to trick Steve there by thinking that you were going on a mission, but not the entire team. Tony, Bruce and Wanda would stay behind, but what they really were doing were taking Pepper, Morgan and all the supplies and everyone’s bags of clothes to the mansion. Bucky had managed to pack a bag with Steve’s clothes without Steve noticing. You had even gotten Fury and Maria into the ruse and they had called Steve with an important mission. Steve hopped into his Captain America mode directly and followed Fury’s orders and gathered the team for the briefing. Everyone managed to keep a straight face doing the bogus briefing and then you left to go to the Quinjet. Nat and Clint piloted the plane and it was your job to occupy Steve with the help of Sam and Bucky so that Steve would fail to notice that the plane was not going in the right direction, and doing some flying around, to give the rest of the team time to get to the mansion before you. It was easier to distract Steve than you thought. Bucky and Sam started to bicker about who would be Steve’s partner on the mission, you had seen their smirks before they started to bicker, so you knew this was something they had planned. Which you were grateful for because you had no idea how to occupy him. All your energy had gone to plan the party. After one hour of bickering, Steve groaned and got up and stalked over to Sam and Bucky.  
“Enough,” he crossed his arms over his chest. “Neither of you are going to be my partner on this mission. Y/N is.” He looked over to you, which Sam and Bucky did as well. They smirked at you and you looked away. You saw Clint do a little gesture that meant that you would be landing in about 20 minutes. All you needed was to keep Steve distracted for a bit more. You got an idea and pulled out your phone and your earphones. When you pulled your bubs into your ears and not even 2 minutes later Steve sat down next to you. You smiled at him and pulled one of the buds out.   
“You really need to hear this song, Steve,” you handed him one of the buds and he put it in. Sam was giving you thumbs up behind Steve’s back. The song you were listening to was ‘What A Man Gotta Do’ with Jonas Brothers. You were dancing in your seat and miming along. Steve was listening to the song and looking at you. He was laughing and started to move along with the beat. When that song ended ‘Simple’ with Florida Georgia Line started to play and you whistled with the intro and then you started to mime with the song again. Bucky and Sam were looking on as you basically were making a fool out of yourself in front of Steve, but you did not care. This was how you were when you listened to your happy playlist and you had always been able to be yourself around Steve. When they sang “It’s like one, two, three” you counted with your fingers. Steve kept his eyes looking at you and smiling. You winked at him when they sang “You make me smile”. He laughed and smiled brightly at you. It was nice to see Steve this relaxed and that it was because of you. Then one of the new Taylor Swift songs came on “Me” that she sings with Brendon Urie and you laughed before you started to mime along. When Taylor sang ‘And you’re the kind of guy the ladies want’ you pointed at Steve and he blushed. And then you pointed between the team during the song on what part that was accurate for that person. Nat’s back during ‘there are a lot of cool chicks out there’. Clint’s back you pointed at when Taylor sang ‘I never leave well enough alone’. And Steve gave you a big smile. Bucky you pointed at when the lyrics were ‘trouble’s gonna follow where I go’. Steve nodded at your pointing, apparently, that one was on point. Sam, you pointed at during ‘And there’s a lot of lame guys out there’. Steve threw his head back laughing. Other than that you pointed a lot on you and on Steve. He was having a good time to, pointing back at you during the song. When the song ended you saw that it was time to land. You did not want to end the fun you were having, but it was time for Steve’s surprise. You nodded at Bucky and Sam when they came over to you. Clint started to land and Steve looked around.  
“What is happening?” He asked and stood up. Bucky pushed him down in his seat next to you, carefully but firm.  
“We are not supposed to land for at least 5 hours,” Steve looked at you and you smiled. Bucky was keeping Steve in place.  
“Wait,” you told Steve. “You will soon see.” Steve handed your earbud back and it was as the fun you were having was blown away. He was almost rigid in the seat next to you. When the Quinjet had landed you took Steve’s hand and together you stood up. He shocked your hand out of his and was like a slap. Maybe this had not been a good idea? Bucky and Sam took over and went with Steve to the back of the jet. They opened the door.   
“This is not a Hydra base,” was all Steve said before the rest of the team Pepper, Morgan and Happy jumped out in front of him.  
“Surprise!” everyone yelled and Steve’s mouth opened wide.   
“We are here to celebrate your birthday,” Sam explains when Steve still is quiet after a minute. He looks around at everyone.   
“You did this for me?” Steve looks at Bucky and just as Bucky is going to explain it was your idea. You shake your head towards him.   
“The whole team did,” Sam looks at you kind of mad. You did not want to take the credit for all the work to get the party together.   
“This is great,” Steve said looking around. “Fury and Hill were in on it, right?” He looks over at Tony who nods.   
“Yes, they were,” Tony looks at you, but you turn around to get your bag. “They thought that you deserved a mini-vacation as much as we do.” Sam claps his hands.  
“Let’s go pack up and then the celebration can start,” he almost squealed. Everyone went into Tony’s mansion that was bigger than you thought. It was by a lake, and Tony tells everyone about his boats and all the fun you could do while you are here. When Tony says something about water-skiing both Sam and Clint starts jumping up and down. But then Tony tells everyone that only Pepper, him or you could drive the boat. Tony knew all about your past, so it did not surprise you that he knew about all the summers you spent on a lake with your family before everything went to hell. Sam turns to you with a big smile.  
“Y/N, please drive us so we can water-ski,” he is giving you serious puppy-eyes and when you look away you see that Clint is doing the same. You toss your hands up in the air.   
“Fine, just let me change my clothes,” You follow Pepper’s directions to the room that would be yours during the stay. Apparently, the house was so big that nobody needed to share a room, well the couples were sharing, but the people that were single did not have to share with anyone. You opened your bag and pulled out your red bikini and your black lace beach dress. After getting dressed you went down the stairs and found Sam and Clint dressed in their swimming trunks already waiting for you. Tony handed you the keys and winks at you. Together you walk down to the dock and onto the boat. Steve and Bucky come running down towards the boat. They also were dressed in swimming trunks.  
“Are there room for us as well?” Bucky asked when they were by the boar. Sam nodded and invited them on board.   
“Hold on,” You pulled on your sunglasses and speeded away from land. Steve came up to you and stood beside you. It gives you a good view of his toned stomach and biceps. There is an argument on who should go first on the skiis until you tell them that you decide so Clint gets to go first. He smiles at you and puts the skis on. When you are speeding on the lake with Clint on the skis behind you you see Steve’s big smile on his lips.  
“You float my boat,” You pull your sunglasses down and wink at him before you pull them up again. Steve throws his head back laughing. Bucky smirks at you and you understood that he had heard what you said. 

A couple of hours later when all the men had tried the water skis a couple of times you told them that you needed food. They all agreed and back to the dock you went. The rest of the day was spent lounging by the pool with the rest of the team and eating fantastic food. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next day you wake up early to go down and start baking Steve’s birthday cake. You chose the caterer’s kitchen in the back of the house and not the main kitchen. So that Steve would not see the cake before it was finished. Morgan walks in ten minutes after you have started.   
“Dad said that you probably were awake so that I should bug you instead,” Morgan gives you a hug.   
“That sounds about right,” you smile at her.   
“What are you doing?” Morgan is watching you put everything you need to bake a cake for Steve on the counter. “A birthday cake for Steve.”  
“Can I help?” Morgan looks at you with big eyes.   
“Sure,” You say and together you start baking the cake. You had music on and was dancing and having fun with Morgan while baking. 

When you leave the cake to cool you walk into the kitchen to find Wanda and Pepper doing breakfast for everyone. Steve had not come down yet, but apparently, they had sent up Bucky to wake him.   
“Happy Birthday, Punk!” you heard Bucky yell loud and you knew that Steve was up. It made everyone in the kitchen laugh, even if you did not want that kind of wake up call any morning. 

A couple of hours later you had finished the cake. Morgan had been running in and out the entire morning. She thought it was no longer fun when you were not mixing things but assembling the cake. You had gone with a simple cake, that looked like a sketchbook. It was open to a sketch. From the begining your idea had been to have a sketch of Steve, but you were nowhere near as talented as Steve. So when the sketching had failed and it looked awful, Morgan had come up with the idea to do a sketch of Steve’s shield. Even you could not mess that one up. You took a step back and saw the finished product. Pepper and Wanda came in and they loved the cake. 

Later that evening Tony had grilled some food, Wanda and You had done some potato salad and salad and together you all sat down as a family out on the deck enjoying the view and breeze from the lake. You toasted Steve and had a wonderful time. Thor had shown up about an hour earlier with Asgardian Mead for the Super Soldiers and Steve looked happy and relaxed sitting in at the end of the table. The conversations were flowing and you all had an amazing time. Steve liked all the presents he had gotten after the dinner, and you saw him look a bit longer on the coloured sketching pens that you had gotten him along with a new thick sketchbook. You hoped he would like sketching with them.   
After the presents had been opened it had become dark outside and Tony told everyone to stand by the railing of the porch. You should have known that Tony would have something up his sleeve. You had left him in charge of the fireworks because it was the 4th of July after all. You had one condition though. That was that the firework should be silent, for all the animals and people who have a problem with the loud noises. It seemed like Tony had come true, the fireworks were fantastic raging with the colours of red, blue and white. It could rival with Disney World’s fireworks and everyone stood looking up in awe at, but sometimes you sneaked a peek to see that Steve was enjoying it. Steve was standing next to you and he put his arm around your shoulder and he looked down on you during one point and smiled at you. Then you came up with what to say.“Baby, you are a firework,” you said loud enough so that everyone heard you. Steve kissed your forehead and laughed at your pick-up line before he looked up on the fireworks again.

A couple of moments later Tony gave you a bit of a gesture that it was time for the cake, you walked away from Steve and into the kitchen and lit the candles on the cake and came out. Everyone turned around as you stepped out on the porch and they started to sing happy birthday to Steve. The man of the hour was laughing and smiling and having a great time. He seemed to enjoy the cake and everyone was commenting on how much they loved the design. When you finally got to bed that night, or early the next morning you knew that it had been a perfect day. Everybody seemed to have enjoyed themself and Steve looked relaxed the whole day. You fell asleep with a big smile on your lips. 

The next morning you woke up early and was planning to make the team breakfast, but in the kitchen was Fury and Maria sitting at the counter.  
“Please tell me you are not here to send us on a mission,” You said as you hugged them. You went away back with the both of them, and Fury had always been like a kind of father figure for you. Especially after your family, all had died. Fury had been the one to keep you grounded, well Fury and Coulson. They were old family friends since your father and mother had been Shield agents. It was only natural that your big brother had joined Shield as well, and you had planned on doing the same, but then they had all died and you were left alone. During a training session with Melinda May, you had tapped into your powers, that nobody knew you had. It had been quite a revelation and when you had trained for a couple of years, Fury had insisted that you joined the Avengers.   
“Not the whole team,” Maria hands you a folder and you open it. They were sending you on a mission. To Russia for an entire month, at least.   
“When do I leave?” you looked at Fury.   
“As soon as you can,” Fury said and you nodded. You hated to leave the vacation, but you were happy you were the only one that needed to leave. The others deserved the vacation and you knew that if Fury came to you himself then this was an important mission. You could not turn it down.   
“Just let me get packed,” you said and left the kitchen. You were packed in under ten minutes and then you went down to the kitchen. Steve was having a heated discussion with Fury when you came down.   
“She is not going,” you heard Steve say. You dropped your bag on the floor with a trump. All eyes in the room were on you.  
“Yes, I am,” you said to Steve. “I can make my own decisions and this is a mission where my skills are needed.”   
“They can send someone else,” Steve crossed his arms. “You are on vacation.” You walked over to him and kissed his cheek.   
“Tell the team I will be in contact if I can,” you hugged him. “And enjoy your vacation.” With those words, you left the mansion and after a few minutes, Fury and Maria joined you.   
“Let’s go,” you boarded their jet and you flew away. You saw Steve walk out of the mansion looking after you.


	9. Vitamin, nightmares and Stars (August)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Mention of hurt Reader.

Nat walked into the kitchen at the compound and noticed that Steve was not there yet.   
“I just talked to Maria,” Nat said and everyone turned to her. Y/N had been away on the mission for 37 days so far and they were all worried about her. She left one voice message on Nat’s phone since she left. “Y/N is coming home today.” Everyone started to talk at once and Nat cleared her throat and everyone stopped talking.  
“I think we all should make ourselves scarce and let Steve be the only one home,” Nat smirks and everyone starts to nod. Steve had been a pain in everyone ass since Y/N left. He was brutal with training and in the free time they had, he was restless. He often walked the hallway up and down in the middle of the night, and when they tried to talk to him about it all he said was that he had trouble sleeping. The team also knew that Steve was in daily contact with Fury to get information about how Y/N’s mission was going, but he got little to non-information.  
Steve comes into the kitchen a couple of minutes later with a big smile on his face. Nat knew that it was because he had talked to Fury and knew that Y/N was coming home. 

You walked off the Quinjet with a bit of a limp and you knew you looked like crap. It had been hard sleeping the last month and you were tired. The mission had gone sideways and you may have been captured by Hydra for two days before you could escape. You had expected the whole team to be waiting on you by the hanger, but it was only Steve. You sent a silent thank you to whoever had made it so. You wanted to see them all, but at the same time it would be exhausting and you knew that you had a lot of questions to answer when you saw them. All you needed now was a hot shower, a lot of chocolate and to crawl down in a soft bed and watch some good movies and forget everything you been subjected to.   
Steve walked up toward you with long strides. You almost wanted to throw your bag to the ground and run into his arms, but you keep your pace slow. It was painful to walk and throwing yourself in your Captain’s arms might not be appropriate, even if he was one of your best friends.   
“You don’t look so good,” was the first Steve said and the frown on his face told a lot. His eyes were searching your body and face for injuries. You were worn out, but you did not want to tell Steve what had happened or what injuries you had. He would find out sooner or later because you knew he would read your rapport, even if he had to get Tony to get a hold of it in a less then legal way.   
“No, I know,” you agree and then you get an idea. “I need a lot of Vitamin ‘Y’.” Steve looks at you and he gives you a big hug, really pulls you close to his broad chest and the heat from his body felt like heaven to your tired hurting body.  
“Ah, just what I needed,” you mumble into Steve’s chest. He chuckles at your response.  
“I missed you,” Steve kissed your forehead.  
“I missed you too,” you smile up at him.  
“Where is everyone?” You ask and look around. Steve runs a hand through his hair.  
“They could not be here. They all had plans already.” Steve rubs his neck and looks away. You place a hand on his arm.  
“Thank Good,” you take a step backwards and a pain shoots through your knee. You make a face but hoped that Steve would not see.   
“Where are you hurt?” He asks and you look down on the ground. You should have known this was coming. “I saw you limp when you got off the plane.”  
“Steve, I was checked by doctors and I am fine,” You could not meet his eyes.   
“Where are you hurt, Sweetheart?” Steve demanded to know. You knew it was no point to argue.  
“I have a couple bruises and a sprained knee,” you look up at him and see him trying to assess if you were telling the truth. He nods, then he takes your bag from your hand. You smile as a thank you, but then he lifts you up and starts to carry you towards the compound.  
“Steve, what are you doing?” you try to keep your giggle in.   
“Carrying you to your room,” Steve answers and smiles at you.  
“What!?” you laugh out while looking around you. Tony would get this on camera and then you would never hear the end of this.  
“You are hurt,” Steve looks serious. “You need to take a shower or bath. And I am going to get us something to eat, snacks and then we are going to watch movies in your room.”   
“That sounds like heaven,” you sigh happily and you lean against Steve’s shoulder. 

Steve carried you all the way to your room and it seemed like he was not even carrying a feather. He put you down and said he would be back later. You smiled as you took your shower and got dressed in a pair of sweats and a sweater that you had stolen from Steve at some point. There was a knock on your door and Steve walked in. He is dressed in sweats and a sweater as well and his arms are full of snacks.   
“I ordered pizza, it should be here soon,” Steve smiles and you limp over to your bed and get comfortable. Steve sat down next to you on the bed and then he turned to you.  
“Are you going to tell me about the mission?” You look down on your lap and shake your head. It was not something that you wanted to talk about right now. Or something you wanted to think about either.   
FRIDAY announced that the pizza had arrived and Steve went to get it. You started flicking through your library to find something to watch with Steve. That was when you found it. Just what would take your mind out of everything. Something that would make you relax. Doctor Who. Steve came into your room with the pizza.  
“Have you ever watched Doctor Who?” you asked Steve and he shook his head.   
“Do you want to watch?” You smiled at him and he nodded. So that was what you watched for the next couple of hours. Until you and Steve fell asleep on your bed, cuddling together. 

You woke up with a scream two hours after you had fallen asleep. Steve immediately started to calm you down, because you were sobbing uncontrollably.   
“Sweetheart, I am here.” Steve kissed your hair and pulled you into his arms. “You are safe. You are home.” You cling to him. Bucky, Sam and Wanda run into the room and when they see Steve in bed they walk out again. You are still crying, but Steve continues to soothe you. After a couple of minutes, you stop crying and you knew that he would like to talk about what had happened.  
“I was taken,” you say when you finally can talk again.   
“What!” Steve almost yells.   
“I was almost finished with the mission,” you say and sit up, a bit away from Steve. “Hydra found out I was undercover and they took me.” Steve puts one hand on your shoulder, the other is gripping your covers so hard that you think they will explode.   
“I was held for two days before I could escape,” you looked at Steve and you saw tears in his eyes. You told Steve all about how they hurt you, how you escaped and how you actually finished the mission and that the Hydra Base was no longer a problem for the world. Steve listened and was quiet the entire time.   
“How long were you in the hospital before you could get home?” He asked. You should have known he would understand.   
“5 days,” you admit and you look down on your hands again. “Dr Cho came with the cradle,” Steve swore under his breath.   
“And you did not think anyone of us would like to be there with you?” Steve glares at you. You swallow loudly and start to fiddle with your hands.  
“I did not want any of you to see me like that,” you admit and Steve places a hand over your hands. “Coulson, Fitz, Simmons and Daisy were with me.” Steve nodded and you thought he would leave you. Steve drags you into his arms and lays down on your bed again.   
“I would have come as well,” Steve mumble against your hair. “Everyone in this team would have come.” You nod and feel the tears in your eyes again. Steve pulls you close and then he starts to talk to you about Doctor Who. You knew it was to help you sleep again and you were grateful. It helped you fall asleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next morning the team is not happy with you when you tell them the truth. Nat leaves the room when you tell them you’ve been in the hospital and not let them know. Even if some members of the team understood your reasoning for not calling them, they still would have wanted to be there. After you told them you were sorry and that it would not happen again, you went to find Nat. She was so angry with you, but you calmed her down. In the end, you hugged it out and she told you that if you did it again, she would kick your ass. Fury had gotten a heated call from Steve the day after you got home, about him not telling the team what had happened to you. And you had an inkling that Coulson had gotten the same call. Because he had sent you a message that informed you that he no longer would be keeping your secrets for you. Knowing that Coulson had been a fan of Steve since before he got out of the ice, you should know that this was coming. Doctor Cho had ordered you to keep away from missions until your bruises and knee healed properly. You cut where healed in the cradle, but bruise had to heal normally. She had thought you should stay of missions for August at least, and then start training slowly at the end of August. That meant that you would be spending a lot of time helping Steve with paperwork, to help with his workload, and you knew that you would be spending a lot of time with Morgan as well. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next coming days, Steve spent the nights in your room. You had tried to sleep alone the second night after you got home, but nightmares plagued you all night. After that Steve started to watch Doctor Who with you every evening and then you fell asleep while cuddling. You knew that he was doing it, but you pretended like you just happened to fall asleep together.   
One evening after you had been baking with Morgan and Pepper you walked into your room to find a blanket fort in your room. There was fairy lighting all over the room, cosy blankets and pillows on the floor. You started to laugh. It looked amazing. Steve came into the room behind you with snacks.   
“Up for some Doctor Who?” he asked and you gave him a big hug.  
“Thank you for this,” You made a gesture against the blanket fort.   
“I wanted to make your day a bit better,” He gave you a small smile, almost shy.  
“Steve, if I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I’d have a galaxy,” you tell him honestly. He was the best about your days. Every day. That made him smile even bigger and you spent the night in the blanket fort. First watching Doctor Who and eating snacks, then sleeping cuddled together. With Steve, you felt safe and when you woke up with nightmares he was there talking to you. Holding you. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

During the month of August, you slowly became better. On Sam’s advice, you had started seeing someone to talk to, something you had never done before. It helped a lot and when you stopped having nightmares every night, Steve stopped sleeping in your room with you. That was the only downside to the nightmares disappearing. You knew that he had only been by your side as a friend and that hurt. It had been 8 months of flirting every chance you got and he still had not noticed. Sure he blushed or laughed. And it always seemed like he was in a better mood after you had flirted, so maybe it at least made him happier. If he only knew that you meant what you were saying.  
Wanda and Nat were cheering you on, telling you not to give up. You promised that you would give it until the New Year and that was a promise you intended to keep. Not only for them but for you. This month had shown even more how in love you were with Steve.


	10. Elements, Carbon Sample and Recklessness (September)

At the beginning of September, you were getting antsy. You wanted to go on missions but there were no missions planned right now. You were cleared by Doctor Cho the week before and you wanted to get out there. While you had been resting the team had been on four missions and during two of them you had been left alone at the compound because Pepper and Morgan were visiting family out of state.  
You got an idea to go see if Steve wanted to do anything so you went to his office and knocked on the door before you step in. Steve is reading some papers on his desk and he just gives you a small smile before he looks down on the papers again. So you walk around his desk to the side he sits on.   
“Steve, I am bored,” you whine and sit down on the edge of his desk.  
“Mmmh,” Steve mumbles as he focuses on the papers. You look around his office trying to come up with something to do.   
“Steve,” you say and lean towards him. This time he looked up at you.  
“Are you made of copper and tellurium?” you bit your lower lip and he tilts his head.   
“Because you’re CU-TE,” You wink and jump off his desk. You can feel his eyes on you as you leave his office. A part of you wanted to go back and give his confused face a kiss, but you wanted him to understand why you were flirting with him. And by the looks of things in his office, he had a lot of paperwork to do and you did not want to disturb. Instead, you went to the gym to put your second work-out for the day in.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Steve was still busy the day after as well and you were kind of pouting. Tony, Bruce, Wanda and Nat were eating lunch in the kitchen with you when Steve came in. He sat down next to you with his own lunch and you did not look at him. He pushed you lightly in the side with his elbow. You looked over at him with a lifted eyebrow and he smiled brightly at you. That was all it took for you to stop pouting. You looked over at Tony and Bruce and got an idea in your head.   
“Are you a carbon sample?” you looked at Steve, but you could feel the rest’s eyes on you.   
“Haha, very funny. I know I am old,” Steve smirks at you.  
“No, I was wondering because I want to date you.” You wink at Steve and Tony spits out his water over the entire table and Bruce has to hit him in his back so he starts breathing again. Steve throws his head back and is laughing loud. Everyone else is laughing as well and you smile at Steve.   
“And here I thought you were going to burn him for being so old,” Tony says and you shrug your shoulders.   
“He already knows he is old,” you wink at Steve and continue to eat your lunch. Everyone gets back to talking and you can feel Steve looking at you sometimes, but you try and not think too much about it. Bruce asks for your help in the lab and the two of you start talking biology, and you soon forget Steve been looking at you. After lunch, you happily follow Bruce to the lab to act as a lab assistant for the day. Finally, something interesting to do. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Then it was finally time for a mission again. It’s been almost three weeks since you were cleared and it felt good to be out in the field again. But the mission went bad or at least according to Steve. You were storming out of the Quinjet with Steve right behind you. He was angry, so angry that if he was a cartoon there would be steam coming out of his ears.  
“Y/N, we are not finished having this discussion,” Steve is growling behind you.  
“Since this is not a discussion, but first you treat me with silence and then you have been yelling at me for the last half-hour without listening to me,” you look over your shoulder. “Then we are finished.”  
“What you did was fucking reckless,” Steve takes a hold of your arm, pulling you to a stop.  
“Not more reckless then you jumping out off the Quinjet without a parachute,” You sass at him.   
“Atta girl,” Tony says as he walks past you.   
“That is beside the point,” Steve mutters and you pull your arm out from his grip.  
“So if you do something it’s not reckless, but when I do it is?” you stare at Steve.  
“Don’t answer that,” Clint mumbles when he walks past. “That is a trick.” You glare at Clint and he hurries on his steps away from you.  
“Well, yes,” Steve fridges with his fingers. You huff and start walking again. You hear Steve swear under his breath and then he follows you.  
“Let me ask you this. If it was Bucky who had done it, had you been yelling at him?” Steve stop and you turn around.   
“I fucking knew it!” you throw your hands up over your head. “You are a Gobshite.”  
“Hey guys, maybe we should talk this through,” Sam comes over to the two of you.  
“Shut up,” You yell at Sam.  
“Stay out of it,” Steve growls at Sam at the same time. Sam takes a step back with his hands in the air and lets you continue arguing. You continue walking and Steve follows you.   
“Y/N, what you did was reckless and you put the entire team in danger,” Steve growled at you. You wanted to hit him, this was never feelings that Steve had made you feel before. How could he be so infuriating?  
“I had it under control!” you stalk onward. Trying to get away from Steve.  
“You had it under control when you ignored orders,” Steve huffs out. “When you ran in the other direction than you should. When you barreled into a room full of Hydra agents.” You stalking down the hallway towards your room now. Steve is still behind you. How you had gotten there you had no idea, maybe being angry made you miss where you were going?  
“That is not how it went,” You opened your door and was about to close it in his face when he stopped the door with his hand. You huff and walk into your room, dropping your bag by your bed. Steve closes the door and walks into your room.  
“It was,” Steve growls and you sigh. You take off your shoes. All you wanted was to take a shower. After being yelled at for a mission that had been successful.   
“I saw you,” Steve continues. “You did not listen. You ran in the other direction.” You walk into your bathroom and Steve follows you.   
“I was saving all our lives,” you turn around and Steve is standing by your bathroom counter. “They were going to blow the place up. And I had back up,”   
“What?” He asked.  
“I said I had back up,” you take off your shoes. Steve is looking at you and not saying a word.   
“Who?” Steve is staring at you.  
“Bucky and Wanda had my back, but you did not see them because apparently, all you could see was that I went against orders,” You huff and turn your back at him.  
“I am sorry, Y/N,” Steve sounds defeated. “I was worried about you when I saw what you were doing. I should have listened to you.”  
“Yes you should have,” You turn back to Steve and he is fidgeting. “I forgive you, Steve, but don’t let it happen again. Listen to me and the team.” Steve nods.  
“Now if you excuse me, Captain, things are about to get real steamy in here,” you wink at Steve and he takes a step back. Right into your bathroom counter. You start giggling and Steve blushes. He must have not noticed that he had followed you into your bathroom. He leaves and closes the door. You slip out of your catsuit and jump into the shower feeling a lot better than you had when you got back to the compound. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that month Steve sat down next to you on the couch. You were reading   
The Fellowship of the Ring, the first book in J.R.R. Tolkien’s book Series Lord of the Rings.  
“Isn’t that a movie,” Steve reads the cover.   
“There is a movie trilogy that is based on three books,” you nod and then you squint your eyes when you look at Steve.  
“Hey, I think you’ve got something in your eye,” you lean closer to Steve.  
“What?” He opens his eyes wider.  
“Oh never mind, it’s just a sparkle,” you say and wink at him. He laughs and then you start talking about the books and the movies. Steve agrees to see the movies with you someday, he thought the storylines sounded interesting. All you could think about was how you made him a fan of Harry Potter and Doctor Who, so now it was time to make him a fan of Tolkien’s magical world. Neither of you noticed that Wanda and Nat were standing in the doorway looking at the two of you. 

“How long will it take before Steve sees Y/N?” Wanda mutters. “I mean realises what he has right in front of him.” Nat nods.   
“I hope soon,” Nat crosses her arms.  
“That is just because you bet on next month,” Wanda smirks.   
“No, well yes,” Nat agreed. “So far Bucky, Tony and Clint have lost, but I am starting to wonder if we all will lose.” She sighs.  
“In the end the one that will lose the most is Steve,” Wanda walks away and Nat nods. If Steve did not understand soon, Y/n would move on. Or would she?


	11. Tired, dictionary and Halloween (October)

It was at the beginning of October and you were walking to the gym in the morning not quite awake yet. Nat had insisted on your training early. You meet Steve at the door to the gym and you walk smack into his chest. You are about to land on the floor when Steve takes a hold of you.  
“Sorry Sweetheart,” Steve smiles at you.  
“You’re the bee’s knees, Captain,” is all that you can get out. Because meeting Steve when you were not expecting and feeling like a zombie. And Steve was wearing a pair of shorts and a tight t-shirt that made your head spin. Steve throws his head back laughing. You blush and bite your lip. He wished you a good walk out and walks away from you. You look at his ass as he walked away. Then you turn around to walk into the gym only to find Peter standing behind you. His gaze on you makes you blush.   
“Are you flirting with Captain America,” Peter asked you. A question you wanted to avoid.   
“No..” you say then you sigh again. “Yes, okay. I am flirting with Steve. Please don’t tell anyone.”  
“The secret is safe with me,” Peter smiles at you. “But I think you should talk with him instead. He does not seem to be a man that notices when women flirt with him.” With that he leaves you alone in the hallway. You groan and walk to the gym. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The month goes fast because of all the missions the team had been on. You had seen Steve very little because you had not gone on many missions with him. Instead, you had been on smaller missions with Nat and/ or Bucky. That had meant that when you were at the compound Steve had been away on missions and when you were away he had been at the compound. But finally, you were both at the compound at the same time. It was Sunday and you wanted to see him. Talk to him and flirt with him. You found him in the library, sitting in the window seat looking out while sketching in a sketchbook. The sight makes you smile and you stop in the doorway just admiring how relaxed Steve looked. You walked towards Steve and judging by the small smile on Steve’s face he knew he no longer was alone, but he kept sketching. You lean over to see what he is sketching and there were no words to describe it. A sketch of Tony and Morgan playing together in the leaves that had fallen. Steve was using the coloured sketching pens that you had gotten him for his birthday. He had sketched it so the leaves were in colour and the rest was black and white.  
“There isn’t a word in the dictionary for how fantastic you are,” you say to Steve and press a kiss to his cheek. Steve blushes but continues sketching. You sit down opposite to him in the window seat and look out on Tony and Morgan. It was so a happy view and you were thankful that this was your family. The silence between Steve and you were comfortable and after a while, you got up and fetched a book to read. What you did not notice was that Steve finished his sketch of Tony and Morgan and that he had chosen you as his new motive. He had a smile on his face the whole time he was sketching you, but you were too consumed by your book to notice. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Does anyone even need to question if Tony Stark throws a Halloween party? Because of course he does, and he forces everyone to dress up. Of those on the team that did not know what to dress up as or that had no ideas on their own, got their costumes chosen by Morgan and went shopping for costumes with Tony. You had come up with your costume by yourself, based on your favourite movie when you were younger. You were going as Dorothy from Wizard of Oz, but you had chosen sparkly red high heels instead of flats and you had painted your lips cherry red. Wanda had helped you with your hair, so it looked almost like Dorthy’s in the movie. You had your basket and in it was a stuffed dog that looked like Toto from the movie. You loved the costume and know that it would be deemed less revealing than some of the other women at the party would be wearing. Not that you cared, you wanted to be true to yourself. Nat was going as the Devil with Red horns and red tail, and a red tight catsuit. And Wanda was dressed as Disney’s Snow White with a long dress on that was a copy of the dress from the movie. She also has a stuffed bird on her shoulder that would start singing if you touched its feathers. It was Morgan’s idea what Wanda should dress at and it was a fitting choice for her. You deemed yourself hot as hell before you left your room together. Since Tony had announced two weeks before that the team needed a break and some fun together and that he was throwing a mandatory Halloween party, you were wondering what Steve was going to come as. You knew that Morgan had chosen costumes for Steve, Bruce, Tony and Pepper, but she had kept it a secret.   
When you walk into the party the first thing you see is Tony dressed as Peter Pan. It was so fitting for the man that had not really been wanting to ever grow up. Pepper stood beside him dressed and Wendy and deep inside you just knew that somewhere was Morgan dressed as Tinkerbell.   
“Auntie Y/N,” you heard Morgan yell and as you thought Morgan dressed as Tinkerbell came running up to you. You caught her in your arms and lifted her into the air.  
“Aren’t you just the cutest Thinkerbell,” you winked at Morgan and she started giggling. You dropped her down and she motioned with her finger for you to come closer so you did. You crushed down and she hugged you close.  
“You can thank me for uncle Steve’s costume later,” She whispered in your ear before she ran over to her father and gave him a high-five. Wanda and Nat were trying to keep in their laughs, but it was obvious that Morgan had not whispered as quietly as you had wished.   
“Don’t say a word,” you tell them before you start looking around the party. You saw Sam, dressed as a firefighter. You laugh and nudge Wanda and then you point to Sam when you see her reaction you start to laugh. Sam as a fireman was really hot, there was no denying it. You walk to the bar together and order drinks. All the waiters were dressed as pirates. After getting your drinks you start looking around the party to see Steve, but so far you hadn’t seen him. You see Morgan walking around the party talking to people and she seems like she is having a good time.   
“Well, hello, there Dorothy,” you hear a voice say behind you. A small part of you hoped it would be Steve, but you did not recognize the voice. And you were right. It was a man you had never seen before. He was looking you up and down. Even though your dress was not revealing you felt undressed. Nat takes a hold of your hand and drags you behind her.  
“Not interested,” she says and the man is going to say something when Bucky comes over. He is dressed as a Dodger baseball player.   
“Walk away,” he says and the man leaves.  
“Thank you, Bucky,” you give him a hug. “That man was creepy.”  
“I did not get good vibes out of him,” Wanda agreed. Nat nods and then you change the subject. Then you hear a laugh that you recognize and you turn around to see Steve. Your jaw almost drops to the floor. Steve was dressed as a cop, a hot fucking cop. There are so many thoughts going through your head and not a single one of them innocent. Morgan skipped up to you.  
“You are welcome,” She says loud and clear and skipped away. Nat, Wanda and Bucky double over with laughter and Steve look over to you. He smiles at you and you give a small wave and a smile before you turn to your friends.  
“This is not funny,” You matter to them.  
“Sweetie, I would love to know what was going through your head when you saw him,” Nat is trying to stop laughing.   
“No, you really don’t,” you look down on the floor. Bucky nudges you.  
“Go talk to him,” he encourages you and Wanda nodes. So you take your drink to go over to Steve. He was talking to Bruce, who was dressed as Buzz Lightyear. Another costume that Morgan had decided if you knew her right. Although when Bruce sees you coming he walks away from Steve.   
“You’re such a treat that I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me,” you say to Steve when you are standing behind him. He turns around and smiles at you.  
“Are you sure you are not talking about you,” Steve winks back. It makes you blush. “I am glad that someone came as a character I know.” Steve tugs lightly in one of your braids. You start talking about Wizard of Oz, one of your favourite movies growing up and a movie that Steve had seen in the cinema before the war. Soon Wanda, Nat, Bucky and Sam joined you. You talked about movies and having a great time. It was hard for you not to focus on Steve. He had always been good looking, but that cop uniform, it did things to you. It gave you a lot of dirty thoughts, and as the evening progressed it did not get better. Nat and Wanda dragged you out on the dance floor, so you handed Steve your basket with Toto and went out to the dancefloor with them. You did not care who was looking, the three of you were just having a great time. Then all the sudden there was a pair of hands on your hips and a body was grinding against you. That was all it took for you to turn stamp hard on the man’s foot. You turned around and it was the man from before. You saw Bucky and Steve take a step forward but you hold up a finger.   
“I never gave you permission to touch me,” you look at the man. “I am not interested in you, so please get the hell away from me.”   
“Oh, girl nobody dances like that without wanting to be touched,” The man smirks at you. Bucky and Steve take another step forward.  
“I take it that you still don’t get it,” you had to keep Nat back. “Get away from me or I will let them,” you tilt your head to the side where Bucky, Steve, Sam and Thor stood watching. “Take care of you.” The man swallows and walks away from you. Steve walks over to you.  
“Are you okay?” He looks concerned. You see Thor and Bucky escort the man out of the room.  
“I need some air,” you said after seeing everyone looking at you. Steve takes your hand and drags you out of the room and outside on a patio. You take a couple of deep breaths and shudder when you feel how cold it is. Then something warm is placed over your shoulders, it was the jacket to Steve’s cop uniform.  
“Thank you,” you smile at him and you shake again.   
“Hey,” Steve says and pulls you into his arms. He hugs you close and you relax. After a few minutes in Steve’s arms, you feel a whole lot better.   
“Did I tell you that I live next door to Dunkin Donuts?” you joke with Steve and he starts laughing. You pull out of his arms and look up at him.  
“I thought you lived just down the hall from me,” Steve smirks and you shrug your shoulders.   
“Well, seeing as you are dressed as a cop I just had to say it,” you smiled and took hold of Steve’s hand again.   
“I think I have said it before,” you look him up and down. “But I do love a man in uniform.” Steve blush and looks down on the floor.   
“Let’s join the party again,” Steve says and drags you inside again. Even though Steve is holding your hand a woman comes up to the two of you when you are inside again. She is dressed in a revealing black dress and has a pointy black hat on.  
“May I ride your broomstick? I lost mine,” She says to Steve and you start laughing. Then she looks at you and you laugh even more.  
“Want to play good cop, bad cop?” you ask Steve and he looks at you nodding.  
“Sorry, he is taken,” you say to the woman and drag Steve further into the party. Steve started to laugh when you got away.   
“I guess that made you the bad cop,” Steve asked and you nodded.  
“Well, you did not say anything,” you shrug your shoulders.  
“I did not know what to say,” Steve tugs you closer to him as he puts his arms around your shoulder.   
“Wait,” you look up on him. “Did you want her to rid your broomstick?” you start to giggle.  
“Absolutely not,” Steve looks scared. Bucky and Sam come over to the two of you and you spend the night with friends. You end up telling the whole team about how you had to save Steve from a woman dressed as a witch and everyone finds it very amusing. 

Later that evening you were when all the people had left and it was only the team left you starting to get a bit tipsy, well no, you were drunk. You smile at Steve and think of all the dirty things you wanted to do with him.   
“I have a great idea for those handcuffs,” you look right at the handcuffs he had in his belt. Pepper snorts and looks away. Steve blushes and takes your drink away from you.  
“I think you had too much to drink,” Steve says and hands the drink to Bucky.   
“Are you going to arrest me?” you hold out your hands. Sam starts laughing. Steve looks at you and groans.  
“Come on, Dorothy, let’s get,” Steve says, taking your hand.  
“Are you going to frisk me?” you wink at Steve and he blushes bright red.  
“Sweetheart, let’s go,” Steve lifts you up and the team looks at the two of you, clearly trying not to laugh.  
“Don’t forget Toto,” you scream out and Bucky hand’s you Toto.  
“Dorothy would never leave without Toto,” you mumble and snuggle into Steve’s neck. Steve agrees and leaves the rest of the team at the party and carries you to your room.   
“You are amazing,” you mumble into Steve’s neck. “I don’t know what I have done to deserve someone like you in my life.” And then you fall asleep.


	12. The video, bad mission and Thanksgiving (November)

The morning after Halloween you woke up with a hangover and groaned. You had clearly been drinking way too much the day before. After getting out of your costume from the day before and taking a shower you shuffle to the kitchen to get some coffee. Sam, Wanda, Pepper and Tony are there already.   
“And there she is,” Sam, you swear he is yelling, but that is probably your head talking.  
“Morning,” you mutter and walk over to the coffee maker.   
“So, did you get frisked yesterday?” Tony asks and you freeze. A part of you is trying to understand what he is talking about while the other part of you has an idea what he means.  
“What?” you curse yourself as the word comes outs of your mouth. Sam snickers and holds out his phone to you. It is a video of you drunkenly flirting with Steve.   
“No,” you whine and look around the room. Tony and Sam are laughing at you, but Pepper and Wanda are not. You hear Steve and Bucky’s voices coming towards the kitchen and you know you can’t face him. There is no way to go, so you take your coffee and sit down at the counter. All you can think is don’t look at him, don’t talk to him, don’t make a bigger fool out of yourself. And leave the room as fast as you can. Steve and Bucky come in and they greet everyone. You nod at them and continue to drink your coffee. When Steve sits down next to you you bolt out of the room and walk fast to your bedroom. There was no way you could be around him, Yes, you wanted him to know how you felt about him. But the things you had said when you were drunk were not how you wanted him to find out. Cheesy pick-up lines were fine, but that was way to sexual and how he had blushed in the video told you how uncomfortable he had been. There is a knock on your door and you know who it is.   
“Come in,” you say and sit on your bed. Steve comes in and you can’t look at him.  
“Hey Sweetheart,” Steve sits down next to you. “Please look at me?”  
“I can’t,” you mumble and look down at the floor. “I am too embarrassed.”  
“You don’t need to be,” Steve places a hand under your chin and lifts it up. “You were cute  
“I was drunk,” you correct him and he smiles at you.  
“A cute drunk,” Steve nudges you with his shoulder.  
“I am so sorry,” you whisper. “That must have been really uncomfortable for you.”  
“It’s okay,” Steve gives you a shy smile. He gave you a hug and then he started to talk about the book he had started to read on your advice. You knew what he was trying to do and you appreciate it. If he was not going to make it weird, then you were not going to do it either. You end up sitting and talking for hours about all and nothing. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A couple of days later the whole team just came back from a hard and difficult mission. Innocent people had been injured and two had sadly died. Everyone was beating themselves up, but Steve seemed to take it extra hard. The team had gotten out with just some cuts and bruises. Pepper was there when the plane landed and took Tony with her to see Morgan. Everyone but you and Steve left the plane together or alone. Steve sat still looking straight ahead, lost in his own thought. You knew that he was beating himself up. But you also knew that there was no way the team could have saved the people who died. How much you wanted to save them all, sometimes it was not possible. The team would never be able to be there faster and by the time you were on the scene the two persons were already hurt so badly that their lives were beyond saving. It did not stop Bruce and you from trying, but it was too late. At least they had someone to hold their hands when they died.   
“Steve,” you placed a hand on his arm. He looked up on you and his eyes were full of tears.   
“There was nothing you could have done,” you say and crouch down in front of him. He nods slowly. You knew that deep down he knew, but losing innocent people always hurt. It always affected the team. Maybe it did not seem like it to the public, but you had nightmares like everyone else, only your nightmare where of the people you did not save, or the horrors you saw every day you were out there trying to save the world. Steve pulls you up to him and gives you a tight hug, you hug him back. All you wanted was to make him feel better. To make him smile.   
“Steve, I don’t know if I want to be alone tonight,” you say into his neck. “Can we have a movie marathon?” Steve breaks away from the hug and looks at you.   
“My room?” he asks and you nod. You stand up and take his hand in yours and together you leave the Quinjet. You separate outside your room door so you can shower and change clothes.  
“See you in a bit,” you say and walk into your room. 

After a shower and change of clothes you went to the kitchen to get some snacks. It was quiet in the compound and it seemed like everyone had retreated into their own rooms to decompress and coop with the mission.You take out some snacks and something to drink, then you go to Steve’s room. You knock on the door and there is no answer.  
“FRIDAY, is Steve in there?” you did not want to open the door and walk in on a naked Steve. Or well yes, you wanted to, but you were not a creep and you wanted to honor his privacy.   
“He said to let you in when you came,” FRIDAY answered so you opened the door. You could hear the shower still going, so you set everything up on Steve’s bedside table. Even though you had been in Steve’s room before you had never really had a chance to really look around without him looking at you. By his desk were all sketching books and pens. He also had a picture of the team on his desk. His bookshelf was filled with books on everything from history to art to popular literary books. You smiled when you saw all the Harry Potter books on his shelf. On the walls he had pictures of the team. Of Bucky and him from before and pictures of Bucky and him from now. There was also some picture of him and you, but seeing as he had pictures on his wall of all team members, you did not read anything into it. 

Steve walks out of the bathroom dressed in only a pair of sweatpants, and your thoughts immediately go down the gutter. You tell yourself that he is your friend and that he needs you, so you will your mind out of the gutter and into the present.   
“What do you want to watch?” you ask Steve as he puts on a t-shirt and a sweatshirt.  
“How about those Lord of the Rings movies?” Steve walks over to his bed and sits down against the headboard. You put on the The Fellowship of the Ring and sit down next to him. Steve pulls you closer by putting his arm around your shoulders and dragging you closer. You lay your head on his shoulder and you watch the first movie, from start to finish.   
You take a break and decide to watch the next movie after ordering some pizza. When Steve has placed the order you look at him.  
“Are you the ring? Cause I’ve got my eye on you,” you wink at him and he throws his head back laughing. It was nice to see him laughing and relaxed again.   
“Come here,” he says and open his arms. You go over there to hug him, but he starts tickling you and that escalates into you trying to tickle you. He was hovering over you, and you thought he was going to kiss you, but then Friday interrupted to say that the pizza was there. Steve went to get the food and something to drink. You took a few deep breaths. You really thought he was going to kiss you.

When Steve comes back you start the second movie, The Two Towers and you eat your pizza. Steve insists on you sitting close to him, even though you are eating, but it is nice. After you have eaten, Steve pulls you closer and you cuddle up with him again. You can feel your eyes starting to get heavy when the movie is almost over, but you tried to keep them open. You were here for Steve, and you needed to be awake to make sure he was doing good.   
Steve turns to you when the credits are rolling on the screen.   
“How about we try and get some sleep?” Steve asks and you nod. You go to stand up and leave the room.   
“Please stay here tonight,” Steve are looking down on his hands.  
“Of course,” you smiled and crawled under his covers. He does the same and then he pulls you closer to him. You lay your head on his shoulder, with his arm around you.  
“The fires of Mount Doom aren’t nearly as hot as you are,” you whisper and Steve lifts his head.  
“Am I too warm?” he asks and you giggle.   
“No silly, you are hot, like good looking, but so much more than that,” you explain and then you yawn.  
“Good night Sweetheart,” Steve presses a kiss to your forehead.  
“Good night, Steve,” you press a kiss to his cheek and close your eyes. A few minutes later you are asleep. 

You and Steve had slept in the same bed and woken up in the morning together, so it was not awkward the next morning. However it was cold when Steve left the bed.  
“Steve, come back here,” you whine still having your eyes closed. “I am cold.”  
“Sweetheart, I need to take a run,” Steve says and press a kiss to your forehead.  
“The run can wait,” you reach your arms out in the air to get him to hug you. “According to the Second Law of Thermodynamics, you’re supposed to share your hotness with me.” Steve chuckles before he crawls into bed with you again.  
“Five more minutes,” Steve whispered in your ear and you fell back asleep.It was not five more minutes. It was more like one and a half hours, before Steve got his run.

Later that day you are cornered in your own room by both Nat and Wanda.  
“Did I see you leave Steve’s room this morning?” Nat is smirking.   
“Yes, and before you ask nothing happened,” you sigh and sit down on your bed.  
“Oh,” Wanda sits down next to you.   
“He was not feeling so good after the mission, so we had a movienight,” You tell them.  
“Then we fell asleep.” You did not tell them how he asked you to stay. It was something you wanted to keep for yourself. Something you did not want overanalysed or something to be used as he likes you back. You were in love with Steve and all you wanted was to tell him. Telling him was the last step for you. If he rejected you, well then you did not know if you would be able to stay with the team. Seeing him almost every day would not help with the process of getting over him. You talk for a bit more, when Nat get’s the great idea that you should work out. Get out some of your frustration with training. And she was right, it helped. During the training Nat and Wanda also help you narrow down a few more pick-up lines to use on Steve. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was Thanksgiving, and for once the whole team and their families were gathered. Last Thanksgiving you had been in a small town in Russia trying to infiltrate a Hydra Factory with Nat. You were happy to finally get a family Thanksgiving with your family. Wanda, Pepper and May had been working in the kitchen all day. You had helped by doing some dessert pies and by decorating and setting the table. But the turkey and all other foods you left to the experts, as you called them.   
Right now you were sitting in front of the tv, with Morgan watching the parade. Steve, Bucky, Sam and Tony were also watching. Morgan had insisted on sitting in Steve’s lap, but that you should sit next to him. Not that you minded. Everyone was fixed on the parade, but you were looking over at Steve now and again. It seemed as he noticed because he looked over at you and smiled.   
“If I can’t break the wishbone, know that I’m wishing for a date with you,” you whisper to Steve. He chuckles and Morgan looks up at him annoyed. She points at the parade, then she moves over to your lap. Apparently, Steve chuckling was not acceptable. You see that Bucky is looking at you with a smirk. That was proof that he had heard what you just whispered to Steve. You lean your head against Steve’s shoulder and continue to watch the parade. 

Pepper announced that the Thanksgiving dinner was served and everyone moved over to the dinner table. It looked great with all the food, and you were happy with your decorations. Although someone had put out place cards, so that everyone had a place to sit. By the looks of the cards, you would say that it was Morgan. You were seated on the right side of Tony, who sat at the end of the table and you were Steve. Tony started by saying grace and then everyone went round the table to say what they were thankful for. Tony started and that meant you were last. Tony was thankful for Pepper and Morgan, and the friendship with the team. Pepper was thankful for Morgan and Tony. And so it went on. Then it was your turn. You stood up, so you could look at your family, because that was what they all were. All that was missing was Fury, Maria and Coulson.   
“I am thankful for this family. As you all know, my parents and brother were agents of Shield and we never spent a Thanksgiving together or Christmas for that matter. One or all of them were away on missions. You are not my biological family, but you are the family that I choose. I am so happy to be here with you. Thank you for always having my back and for letting me be me. I love you.” You say and raise your glass. Morgan hops out of her chair and runs to you. She hugs you.  
“We love you too, Auntie Y/N,” Morgan says out loud and everyone agrees. You get tears in your eyes and hug her back. You make her go back to her seat and you sit down again.  
“Digg in,” Tony is wiping something away in his eyes and everyone starts to eat. Steve places a hand on your thigh and gives a small squish. You know that it means that he is here for you so you give him a smile. 

Later, when it is time for desert you know you can’t keep it in. So you turn to Steve and whisper in his ear.  
“You’re sweeter than a hot marshmallow on a candied yam,” You wink at him and Steve blushes red. Tony and Pepper are smirking at each other and you can see that Nat pushed Bucky on the side and nod towards you and Steve. It takes a bit for Steve to start talking again, but when he does he gives you a big smile that makes your heart beat faster. Just when he is about to say something to you, Tony stands up and announces that he had donated money in the name of the Avengers to a couple of animal shelters and other organisations around the US. Everyone cheered. You look at Steve, but now he is turned to Sam talking, and you know that whatever he wanted to tell you wasn’t important.

After dinner and desert, Morgan announces that it’s time to start decorating for Christmas. Everyone groans and says they are too stuffed. She looks disappointed, before Steve tells her you all can watch a movie instead. So that is what you do. You sit down on a couch and not a minute later Steve sits down next to you. He puts his arm around your shoulder and you cuddle up next to him. Not even ten minutes into the movie you fall asleep on Steve’s shoulder and you could not even tell anyone that asked what move you were looking at. Later you partly wake up to Steve carrying you to your room and placing you under the covers in your room.  
“Good night, Sweetheart,” you hear him say before he presses a kiss to your forehead. You really wanted to tell him to stay, but sleep overtakes you again and you snuggled up in your bed.


	13. Wish list, Hot Chocolate and Snow (December)

It was the first of December and a month you had not been looking forward to. This was the last month you had given yourself to flirt with Steve. This was the last month you had given yourself to be in love with him. You needed to up your pick-up lines and make them more obvious. Maybe then he would finally understand what you were trying to do. You decide to take a walk to clear your mind. After getting dressed in warm clothes you leave the compound.  
“Y/N, wait up,” Steve was yelling. You stop and turn around. Steve is running towards you.  
“Hey,” You smile at him.  
“Are you going for a walk?” You nod. “Can I go with you?” Steve smiles at you and you nod again. The two of you walk in silence and it feels like the cold air is clearing out your lungs.  
Steve starts talking to you about the Harry Potter books, a topic you have nothing against talking about. Steve had just finished reading Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix. You walk into the woods and you stumble on a stone. Steve grabs a hold of you so that you don’t fall.  
“Thank you,” you smile at him. “And thank God I’m wearing gloves.”  
“Why?” Steve tilts his head. “Are you cold?”  
No, because you’re too hot to handle,” you wink at him. He laughs and you continue talking about the Harry Potter books and his theories. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

Almost all of the team was away on a mission and you find yourself trapped in a small room. Outside the room were twenty hydra agents. That would not have been a problem, but somehow you had no more ammo.  
“I need some back-up,” you say into the coms. “I am outnumbered, without any ammo, but I got the flash-drive with the information we needed”. You hear Steve swear.  
“Language, Captain,” Tony says. You tell them where you are. There is a swish in the air a couple of minutes later and then you hear fighting. You open the door carefully and see that Steve had thrown his shield and was now fighting some Hydra agent. After joining the fight and no more Hydra agents standing you turn to Steve.  
“You’re the cat’s meow” you wink at him. Together you continue to leave the Hydra base together meeting up with the rest of the team outside. But later on the Quinjet, when the whole team was safe and the mission was finished, Sam wonders what that had meant. You had told him to google it and then you had fallen asleep on Steve’s shoulder. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

It is the fourteenth of December and Morgan had insisted that Steve and you would come with her, Pepper and Tony to meet Santa. You were ready to go, but waiting on The Stark family. Steve was sitting in the kitchen ready as well. Morgan’s request had given you an idea, but you had yet to go through with it. Now seemed to be the perfect idea.  
“Hey Steve, can I take a photo of you?” You ask as you pull out your phone.  
“Why? You already have some,” Steve tilts his head.  
“I want to show Santa what I want for Christmas,” you wink at him. He throws his head back laughing.  
“If you want to,” he says after a while.  
“Smile,” you say and take a photo with your phone. The picture was better then you had thought it would be. The sun from the window behind Steve was giving him a kind of glow and you immediately changed the picture to your background.  
“What are you doing?” Steve asked and stood up. You were going to show him how you had made him your background when Morgan ran up to you.  
“We are seeing Santa today,” She jumped up and down in front of you.  
“I know Sweetie,” you smile at her enthusiasm. “Do you have your wish list ready?”  
“Yes,” She holds up her list. “Do you?” You hold up your phone and show her your picture of Steve. Morgan starts to giggle and look at Steve.  
“Uncle Steve, do you have a wish list for Santa?” She asks and Steve shakes his head. Tony and Pepper come around the corner.  
“Mom, Uncle Steve does not have a wish list,” Morgan looks sad.  
“Honey, not everyone makes wish lists for Christmas,” Pepper tries to explain. Morgan nods and Tony ushers you all out to the car. 

You arrive at Santa’s village and Morgan is jumping up and down with excitement. She pointed out the big gingerbread house, the elves and the line to meet Santa. You were more happy that you would meet a real reindeer. Since you were a little girl you had always wanted to pet one and according to Tony they had all of Santa’s reindeer’s here. Morgan dragged you over to the cue to meet Santa and you stood there waiting patiently for an hour. Steve, Pepper and Tony were walking around looking at things. When it was Morgan’s turn to sit at Santa’s lap they came over and took a bunch of pictures of it. Then Morgan told Santa that you also had a wish list. You could see that Santa thought it was funny so he patted his lap. You walked over and sat down. What you failed to see was Tony filming the whole thing and Pepper taking pictures.  
“Hey, Santa,” you smiled. “I am..” Santa raised his hand.  
“I know who you are and I know for a fact that you are on the nice-list,” Santa winked at you. Morgan jumped up and down when she heard this.  
“Then you must know what I wish for Christmas as well,” you blushed and Santa chuckled.  
“I have my guesses, but please tell me anyhow,” Santa said and Morgan looked on curiously.  
You take out your phone and open to the picture of Steve. Santa starts to chuckle and you see Steve looking on with big eyes.  
“Just as I thought,” Santa nods. “But I don’t think I can give you what you wished. All I can do is give you some advice.” You nod.  
“Tell him how you feel,” Santa whispers and you bit your lip.  
“Thank you, Santa,” you said and gave him a kiss on the check before you jumped off his lap and took Morgan by the hand and started to walk to where the reindeer’s were kept.  
“Wait a minute,” you hear Steve come after you. “Did you really show Santa my picture?”  
“Of course I did,” You giggled. “You are what I want for Christmas.” Steve stopped and stared at you. Morgan pulled in your hand so you left him standing there. Meeting the reindeer’s was better than you had thought. You felt like a child on Christmas when you got to pet not only Dasher and Dancer. But Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph. Tony and Pepper took a lot of pictures of you and Morgan petting them. Steve kept his distance from you and it hurt a lot. Maybe this was a rejection. Maybe he understood how you were feeling for him now and this was his way of showing that he did not have the same feelings. Morgan pulled in your hand and pointed at Steve. He stood a couple of meters away looking at headbands with different Christmas themes. There was Santa Hats, reindeer horns and mistletoe. He paid for a couple and walked over to Morgan and you. You smiled at him and he smiled his bright happy smile back. The ache in your chest disappeared and Steve handed Morgan a headband with brown reindeer horns and a headband with a bit bigger and golden reindeer horns for you. Morgan threw herself on Steve and thanked him. You gave him a kiss on the cheek and did the same. Steve helped Morgan on with her headband and you put yours on. Tony and Pepper took a picture of Morgan, you and Steve standing in front of the reindeer’s, Steve had his arm around your shoulder and Morgan stood in front of you. Morgan hoped out of one picture so it was just you and Steve standing together. To anyone that saw you it would look like you were taking a couples picture for like your Christmas card. What you missed was Steve looking down at you with a big smile. Then you took a picture of Morgan with her parents. When you were finished with the photos it was decided that you should explore Santa’s Village and all the shops. Steve put his arm over your shoulder and off the five of you went. You found a couple of Christmas Stockings present for the team. Then Steve and you found a shop that did Custom Christmas ornaments and you needed to buy one for everyone of your family members. Steve stood laughing when you explained how you wanted each of them to look. It would take the shops a couple of days to make all the ornaments, so you decided that you would pick them up later. Steve and you meet Morgan, Pepper and Tony a couple of shops over carrying a lot of bags, and that was when you saw it. A shop you wanted to go to, but without Steve. You made a gesture for Morgan to distract and occupied Steve, which she gladly did and you left the group to buy something for Steve. 

After a few hours at Santa’s Village and all loaded with a lot of bags, it was time to get back to the Compound. Morgan and you were still wearing your headbands. Steve helped you to your room with all your bags and you thanked him for it.  
“Do you want a cup of hot chocolate?” you ask Steve and he nods. Together you walk to the kitchen. Wanda had teached you how to make hot chocolate a couple days ago, and this was the first time you would do it without her supervision. Steve and you were talking about Christmas and Steve was telling you what he and Bucky used to do before the war. When the hot chocolate was finished you turned around with the mugs, but Steve was closer than you had though. That made you pour all the hot chocolate over his chest and stomach.  
“Oh, Steve I am so sorry,” you cry out. You turn around and place the mugs on the counter and to grab a towel. When you turn around Steve stood there without a shirt on.  
“Call me Rudolph, because you just sleighed me,” you get out and Steve blushes.  
“I will just go and change,” Steve mumbles and he leaves the room. You swear under our breath. That man would be the death of you, there was no doubt about it. You cleaned the floor before you started to make more chocolate. All the time you saw Steve’s chest in front of you. How could anyone even look like that? It was as he was sculpted by marbor and turned into a man. Blessed by the gods, that was what he was.  
Steve came back and the two of you enjoyed the hot chocolate and laughed at some of the gifts you had bought for the team. Deep inside you knew that this would be the best Christmas in your entire life. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

The couple of days later Morgan had decided that the whole team should watch a Christmas movie to get into the holiday spirit. According to here there were a couple of Grinches in the bunch. She never said any names but everyone knew who she meant. Steve and Bucky did not know what she meant when Grinches meant and that was the reason that she had decided that the movie “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” was what you should watch. Personally you loved all Christmas Movies and would have been fine watching whatever she had chosen, but the Grinch was one of your all time favorite movies.  
“You are going to love this movie,” you told Steve. With that you left to get some hot chocolate that Wanda had done. You heard Tony tell everyone to find a seat. When you walked into the room there was only one spot left, next to Steve. You walked over to him and sat down. Then Tony started the movie. Even though you had watched the movie at least hundred times it still got your full attention. About a third through the movie your hot chocolate was gone and when you put your mug on the table, Steve put his arm around your shoulder and pulled you close. It was nice to watch movies cuddled up with Steve and you relaxed against his body. This was home to you. In his arms. Not the compound, but in his arms. Feeling safe and relaxed. Oh, how you wished he loved you back.  
“If I was the Grinch, I wouldn’t steal Christmas, I’d steal you,” you whisper in Steve’s ear when the Grinch steals Christmas from the Who’s. Steve chuckled and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You cuddle closer to Steve and when the movie ended Morgan demanded that you watch Elf as well. Nobody had any objections, but during Buddy and Jovies date you fell asleep with your head on Steve’s chest. 

Steve noticed when Y/N fell asleep on him, but he did not care. It was nice having her close like this and she always looked so peaceful when she slept. The Elf movie was good, but Steve had a hard time concentration on it when Y/N moved a bit in her sleep. When the movie ended Steve lifted her up in his arms to take her to her room.  
“You are under the mistletoe,” Morgan yells out and everyone went “shh” not wanting to wake Y/N. Steve looks up and sees the mistletoe.  
“You need to kiss her,” Morgan crosses her arms.  
“Sweetie, she is asleep,” Pepper tells Morgan.  
“But if she wakes up, then it’s a true love’s kiss,” Morgan argues.  
“Morgan, it is creepy kissing someone that is asleep,” Tony tells his daughter.  
“But it is tradition,” Morgan stomps on the floor. Steve looks at Morgan to Y/N in his arms. He presses a kiss to her forehead and Morgan gives him a small smile. Steve then leaves the room and goes to tuck Y/N into her bed, then he presses another kiss to her forehead before he leaves the room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

There were just five days left until Christmas and you stood looking out the window. The snow less view was making you sad. Standing in a room that was decorated for Christmas with all that you could imagine and then look out and there was no snow. That was not right. You had hoped there would be a white Christmas, but so far no snow. Someone walked into the room, but you did not care. You did not want to show anyone the pout that you were sure was on your face right now. A pair of arms wrapped behind you and you knew that it was Steve.  
“What are you thinking about?” he asks and you could not keep it in.  
“It is your fault,” You say and you feel Steve get tense.  
“What is?” Steve asks with a bit of an edge to his voice.  
“That we won’t get a white Christmas,” you mumble. Steve starts laughing.  
“Sweetie, I can’t control the weather;” Steve presses a kiss to hair.  
“No, but you’re so hot,” you turn your head upwards so you can see his face. “And that is disturbing with the weather.” Steve threw his head back laughing. You huff and break out of his arms. Steve grabs a hold of you and pulls you into his arms.  
“Thank you, sweetheart,” Steve mumbled against your forehead. “For always making me laugh.” You melted against him and wished you had the guts to kiss him.  
“Want to read something?” Steve asks and you nod against his chest. You walk to the library together. Steve pulls out one of his sketchbooks he had there and you took out the book “A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens. A book you always wanted to read, but never gotten around to. You sit there in silence together, you reading and Steve sketching you reading, but that he is sketching you is nothing you knew about. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

It is Christmas Eve and you did not want to get up- Your bed is warm and you had no training for a couple of days, a Christmas gift from your Captain. That almost sounded dirty, like Steve was your Captain. You stretch in your bed about to fall back asleep, but then you hear Morgan yelling.  
“Snow, it is snowing.” You jumped out of bed and ran to the window. When you got your curtains out of the way, you saw that she was right. Outside was a thick layer of snow and it was still coming down. You do a happy dance and then you throw on some warm clothes before you grab your jacket, gloves and hat. Morgan meets you in the hallway. She is still just in her pyjamas.  
“Go get dressed,” you tell her and she runs away. You go to Steve’s room and pound on the door. Steve opens the door with only a pair of pyjamas pants. It made you take a double take before you look up in his amused blue eyes.  
“Steve, it is snowing,” you are almost jumping up and down on the spot. “Get dressed and come out with us.” Steve crosses his arms over his chest and it makes you bit down on your lip. Fuck, he was good looking, no there was no words for how he looked. Out of this world, was the best you could come up with.  
“I thought you said it was my fault, well, my hotness,” Steve is smirking at you.  
“Well, obviously I got it wrong,” you throw your hands up in the air. “Now get dressed and go out with us.” you smiled at him and he shook his head.  
“Pretty please, Steve,” you plead with him.  
“Right, pretty please, Steve,” you hear Bucky mock you behind your back. Steve looked at you before he bowed down and pressed a kiss to your check.  
“Fine,” he whispered in your ear. Then he closed his door. You turn around to Bucky who was smirking at you.  
“He will not come out,” Bucky said and you shrug your shoulders.  
“I think he will,” you said as Morgan came running down the hallway.  
“Auntie Y/N, Lets go,” Morgan grabbed your free hand and started to drag you to the door. You laughed and followed her. By the door you put on your jacket and hat, then you checked that Morgan was dressed properly before you put on your gloves. Then you run out hand in hand in the snow. You both dance around in the snow with your heads tilted up to get the snow in your face. You twirl Morgan around and she is laughing. The door opens and Pepper, Tony, Bruce, Wanda and Bucky come out. All bundled up. Morgan jumps to her father’s arms and giggles. You lay down in the snow and do a snow angel. Wanda lays down next to you and does the same. 

Friday starts playing Christmas music through the outdoor speakers and you pull Wanda up. She twirls you around and then when Wanda lets you go with a wink. It made you twirl right into a hard chest and you look up and meet Steve blue eyes, then you fall on your ass in the snow.  
“I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you,” you wink at Steve and start laughing. Steve shakes his head before he lifts you up. When you stand up again, you slip on some ice under the snow and Steve grabs a hold of you. It makes you stand pressed against his chest and he is looking down on you. And you could have sworn Steve was looking at your lips. Just as Steve is about to say something, he gets a snowball in his back. He turns around and you see Bucky’s apologetic face. Instead of letting it destroy your mood, you quickly make a snowball and toss it at Bucky. That was how a snowball fight erupted by the team, Morgan and Pepper kept out of it, but even Bruce joined in. You were laughing and having a great time, that was when Steve tackled you right into the snow. It did not hurt, but it surprised you.  
“What,” was all you could get out.  
“Bucky was about to throw a snowball in your face,” Steve explain still laying on top of you.  
“Aww..” you smile up at him. “I didn’t think I was a snowman but you just made my heart melt.” Steve started to laugh and he had still not gotten off you. Morgan comes over looking down at you.  
“Do you want some privacy?” She smiles and then turns to her father who is giving her both his thumbs up. Steve blushes and gets off you, when he stood up he offered his hand to help you up.  
“It is time for breakfast,” Morgan says take one of your hands and one of Steve’s and together you walk into the compound again. You smile at Steve, but he is still blushing. When you got inside and smelled the good breakfast that Wanda had made you forgot about Steve’s behaviour. After all it was Christmas Eve and you had a lot of Christmas gifts that needed to be wrapped before the day was over. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

It was Christmas Day and you wake up sitting right up in your bed. You were awake late the night before, making sure you were the last one to place the gifts you had gotten under the tree and doing the last fixes on your gift to Steve. You got dressed and went to the common room where the tree and stockings were. Nobody was awake yet, but you knew that it was just a matter of a time. So you went into the kitchen and started making breakfast. But Wanda was already in there making breakfast with Sam.  
“Merry Christmas,” they laughed and smiled at you. You greeted them back and took a cup of coffee and sat down at the counter looking at them. Soon the kitchen was filled with your family. You look at them and smile, even if Steve did not love you, this was still your family and they made you happy. Morgan was arguing with Tony that she wanted to open the gifts Santa had left before breakfast, but Pepper stood her ground. Breakfast first, then gifts. You sat down together and at the fantastic breakfast Wanda and Sam had done. 

Then when everyone had finished Morgan screamed out.  
“Gift, Santa left us all gifts,” She runs from the table and out to the common room. Everyone is laughing and follows her at a more normal pace into the room. She is standing looking at the small mountain of gifts under the tree. Everyone but Tony takes a seat. Morgan sat down on the floor. Tony puts on a Santa hat and starts handing out gifts to everyone. Then when every gift under the tree was gone, the unwrapping began. You went one gift at the time so that everyone can see peoples reaction to the gifts. Everyone loved the custom Christmas ornaments you had ordered and everyone put theirs on the tree directly. May blushed that you had bought one for her as well and you told her that she was family. She went over and gave you a big hug. You saw Happy standing a bit from everyone looking at his Christmas ball. He had tears in his eyes, but you did not want to disturb him. You figured that you would talk to him later. 

There was one gift that you had not placed under the tree. You wanted it to be the last gift of the day, and Tony had agreed. So when everyone had finished Tony said that there was one gift left. You stood up and walked over to Steve and gave it to him. You had problems looking when he unwrapped it. With the help of Tony you had built a small studio at the back of the compound for him to do his art in, and try other mediums. Steve held up the key and looked at you so you handed him your hand. He took it and hand in hand you walked out to the back of the compound. The rest followed you. Morgan asked where you were going but Tony just shook his head. Almost to the woods. You pointed on the door and Steve put his key into it. He unlocked the door and stepped inside.  
“Merry Christmas, Steve,” You smiled and you saw him look around. You had filled the studio with all kinds of artist material so that he could try whatever he wanted. For example Tony had bought marble and clay so Steve could try sculpting. You had bought aquarelle and oil so he could try that.  
“This is amazing,” Steve looked around. “This is for me?” He asked and you nodded.  
“If it’s from Morgan, Pepper, Steve and me,” you said and He wrapped you in his arms and span you around. He realised you and looked around the room again.  
“A thousand thank you,” He looked over at Tony and Pepper. Morgan ran over to him and he pulled her into his arms.  
“You deserve it, Uncle Steve,” Morgan pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Now you can paint Auntie Y/N in many different ways.” She smirked and Steve blushed.  
“Come on,” you said and started toward the door. “Let’s leave Steve alone to explore his new place.”

When you left the studio your phone plinged and it was a text from Jemma and Leo, thanking you for their Christmas gifts. You sent thanks for their gifts and walked to the compound.  
During the day you got text from Fury, Maria, Coulson and the rest of your shield family. They all thanked you for their Christmas presents and their custom ornaments. It made you smile that they liked them.  
“You really did go all out on gifts this year,” you hear Bucky say behind you. He had sneaked up on you and read your messages.  
“I just showing the people I love that I care about them,” you assure Bucky. He smiles at you.  
“Is that why you’ve been spending all your free time getting Steve’s studio ready?” You swallow.  
“You know you should just a pick-up line at him like: ‘You know, I’d love to show you the toys my elves make for adults’. I bet that would get his attention,” Bucky winked at you and you blushed.  
“I want him to see I love him, not give him a heart attack,” you look down at the floor. “And that might give him the idea that I am just interested in his body. I am interested in the whole man, not just his body.” You leave Bucky standing there. You did not want to talk more about the subject. 

A lot later after dinner you were all sitting in the comonroom talking, eating candy and enjoying each other’s company. There is a lot of laughing and you look over at Steve. He was already looking at you so you took the opportunity to flirt with him.  
“Even Santa can’t make candy as sweet as you,” you wink at Steve and he blushes before he presses a kiss to your cheek. You wanted to take a hold of him and say you missed and then kiss him, but it seemed to be wrong. Inside you are groaning. Just a couple days left of the year and then.. Yeah, what then. You did not know, but push all thoughts aside. Right now you would enjoy being with your family. Steve laughs at something Sam says and then he places his arm around your shoulder. He pulls you closer to him, and you are more than happy to move closer. The smile he gives you when he looks down on you makes butterflies fly in your stomach, and you see the knowing smiles that Wanda, Nat and Bucky are giving you. It makes you blush, but it also gives you hope that maybe, just maybe, Steve liked you too. 

Christmas Day is over way too quick, but it has been a fantastic day. Steve walks you to your door and you start thinking that maybe he will finally kiss you, but now. You part with him pressing a kiss to your forehead and walking away. You close the door and slump against the door. What did a woman need to do to get the man she loved to notice her? That is what you are thinking about when you fall asleep alone in your bed. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

Tony was throwing a party again. It was New Years Eve after all. Pepper had bought everyone new clothes for the occasion, seeing as you had been away on a mission and haven’t gotten the time. When you had come back the day before, there had been a garment bag, a shoe box and some other boxes in your room, but you had been too tired to even look at it. You trusted Peppers fashion sense and her knowledge of what you were comfortable in wearing. And you were not disappointed when you opened the garment bag just an hour before the party was starting. It was a sparkly floor length midnight blue dress. It had a V neckline that showed off the rounding of your breast, but it was still not too revealing. The dress followed your curves, but the skirt was a bit more loose. You knew that you would feel like a princess in that dress. The black high heel shoes were also something you would buy for yourself. With a big smile you sit down in front of your mirror, trying to come up with how you would do your hair and make-up. This was the last day you had given yourself to flirt with Steve. Even if you tried to get the thought out of your head, it was there gnawing at you. There was a knock on your door and Wanda and Nat walked in, already dressed and ready for the party.  
“We are here to get you ready,” Wanda says and you feel tears building up in your eyes.  
“Thank you,” you get out and then they take charge. Wanda was doing your hair and Nat was doing your make-up. They decided to keep it simple and elegant. The make-up for your eyes was a subtle golden eye shadow with a slight smoky eye effect and then Nat painted your lips red. Wanda decided to keep your hair down and curled it. When you got to see yourself in the mirror, you almost started to cry. You looked beautiful.  
“Thank you,” You hugged your friends.  
“Don’t mention it,” Wanda smiled at you.  
“Just do us a favor,” Nat smiled at you and you nodded. “Come to the party at least ten minutes too late.” That went against your principles, but you nodded again. They left you alone to get the dress on. There was a knock on the door again and Pepper walked in. She was also ready. In her hands she held a box.  
“Can you please wear these?” Pepper asked and opened the box. Inside was a necklace with a dark blue stone surrounded by diamonds and a bracelet in the same style.  
“Are you sure?” You asked and Pepper noded.  
“Yes, I will wear it,” you agreed and Pepper gave you a hug.  
“I need to go,” Pepper placed the box on your counter. “Please show up a bit late.” And with that she was out of the door. You shook your head, but if your friends told you to show up late, that was what you were going to do.  
After getting dressed and putting on the jewelry you were ten minutes late to the party. You put your feet in your shoes and walked out of your room. The hallway was empty, but you could hear the music from the party. 

When you stepped into the party, you could feel eyes on you but you were looking for someone special. You were looking for Steve. Nat and Wanda held up their glasses of Champagne and you took that as a cheer that you followed their request. Then you saw Steve and he almost took your breath away, dressed in a black tux with a dark blue bow tie. He was talking to Bucky and Sam. You saw Bucky nod in your direction on Steve turn around and look at you. When your eyes met and you saw his slacking jaw you wanted to giggle. The feeling in your body was happiness with butterflies. You hoped it meant that he liked how you looked. You walked further into the party and a man you never saw before walked over to you.  
“Do you want to dance?” He asked and looked a little too long at your chest. Before you could say no. Steve walked over to you.  
“There you are Sweetheart,” Steve said and dragged you away from the man.  
“That was rude,” you laughed at Steve’s expression. Could it be that Steve was jealous? You wondered.  
“I just don’t want a repeat of other parties,” Steve mumble and you knew he meant when you were felt up by the man a couple months away. You dragged your hand out from his grip.  
“I can take care of myself,” you turn around and start to walk to the bar.  
“I am sorry,” Steve took your hand again and stopped you.  
“I should not have dragged that up,” Steve scratched his neck. “Can we start over?” You nodded, because you did not want to spend the evening fighting with Steve.  
“You look breathtaking,” Steve said and lifted your hand to his lips. He pressed a kiss to your hand.  
“And you look handsome,” You smiled at him.  
“Join me talking to Bucky and Sam?” He asked and you nodded. He kept holding on to your hand. Bucky looked a lot on your hands, but when you said nothing about it he did not bring it up.  
After a while you notice a window for you to flirt with Steve. You turn to him and he looks at you.  
“Hershey factories make millions of kisses a day, but I’m asking for only one at midnight,” you wink at Steve. He laughs and you look down at the floor. Not wanting to show him how sad you felt right now you leave the group and go over to the bar. Some whiskey would help you feel better. This mood was not for champagne. 

Steve looked after Y/N. He did not understand why she just left them standing there without another word.  
“You know she is flirting with you, right?” Bucky smirked at Steve.  
“What? Who? Y/N?” Steve looked after her. “No, she is not. That is just how she is.” Bucky shakes his head.  
“She looks at you like you are the best thing since sliced bread and she only flirts with you,” Sam argued.  
“So you’re telling me, that the woman I am head over heels over, the woman I am sure is the love of my life, likes me?” Steve is looking around the room for Y/N. He sees her standing by Dr Strange talking with him and his date. In her hand she is holding a glass of Whiskey, something she only drank when she was sad or cold.  
“What are you waiting for, Punk?” Bucky pushes Steve towards her. Steve looks at his friend.  
“Go dance with her,” Sam groans.  
“There is the right partner for you,” Bucky pushes him again and Steve walks over to Y/N.  
“Can I have this dance?” Steve holds out his hand and Y/N takes it. When they walk out on the dance floor the song ends and Y/n looks up at him as the next song starts playing.  
“I love this song,” She smiles at him. “It always reminds me of you.” Steve smiles down at her and pulls her in closer to him.  
“What is it’s name?” Steve asks.  
“Diamonds and Twine,” She answers and the lyrics start. He can hear her sing along with the words and he concentrates on the words. 

‘You know when you know. You hear that all your life.  
Well whoever they are Turns out they were right.  
Sunshine, the good times. Yeah we got a few behind us  
When the bad times come I ain’t gonna run.’

Steve smiles and agrees in his mind that the words seemed to suit the two of them. He thought back to last year. Y/N flirting with him, the mystery Valentine’s gift that he was pretty sure was Y/N doing. His surprise birthday party. Her taking care of him after the bad mission. His studio, that Tony informed him the day before was Y/N idea and that he only gave her some of the money and some contacts. He knew he missed a whole lot of things she did for him. But the most important thing, she always made him laugh. All these seemed to be signs of Y/N love for him. 

You were dancing close with Steve to one of your favorites songs and you were singing along to it quietly. Part of you wanted Steve to listen to the lyrics closely, but the other part of you was scared that if he did he would reject you. You force those thoughts away and just enjoy dancing close to the man that you loved. Being here in his arms, made you realize that he really was the love of your life. There was no other place you wanted to be and it was scary. You also knew what you would break your own promise. If he still had not realised when the night was over, then you would tell him. Then you would know what he was feeling. You deserved to give yourself that much, even if his answer would hurt you. At least there would not be any ‘What if’s’ in your life. The song ended and you took a step back. You had the last pick-up line ready and when you saw his blue eyes full of sparkle look down on you. Then you knew it was time.  
“I’ll be yours forever. Just tell me when to start,” you winked at him, but instead of laughing Steve is looking at you. Really looking at you.  
“What did you just say?” Steve asked and tilted his head to the side. You sigh and look down at the floor. You repeated the line, but not daring to look at him. He placed a hand under your chin and lifted your face up so you were looking at each other.  
“Are you flirting with me?” Steve’s face was expressionless.  
“I have been for over a year, thanks for noticing,” You smirked at him.  
“Does this mean you like me?” Steve smiles at you, finally showing some emotion.  
“No, it means I love you,” You blush and you have a problem with breathing. Steve’s smile get’s brighter and you feel your legs shake, before he closes the distance between the two of you and kisses you. A hungry kiss filled with love.  
“You have no idea how long I have wanted to do that,” Steve whispered against your lips when he had pulled back. “And for the record, I love you too.” After some more kissing, Steve started to dance around with her again. Their eyes were on each other and everyone else in the room seemed to disappear.  
“What took you so long?” You asked him after a few minutes.  
“I thought that was how you were with your friends.” Steve scratched the back of his neck.  
“Have you seen me flirt with anyone else here?” you bit your bottom lip.  
Steve tilts his head.  
“No…” Steve admits.  
“You are a moron.” you laugh.  
“I am your moron” Steve says and winks at you. Then he kisses you again. When the kiss breaks up you giggle.  
“Well, this year at least I got someone to kiss at midnight,” you smile at him.  
“Sweetheart, for every year that will come, you will have someone to kiss at midnight,” he kissed you again. “Forever starts now. You are mine and I am yours.” You smirk and blushed some. Steve lifted you to your toes and kissed you again. 

Nat, Wanda, Pepper, Tony, Bucky, Sam and Clint looked on Steve and Y/N dancing, kissing and laughing on the dance floor. It seemed as if they did not notice anymore that they were not alone in the room.  
“Finally,” Nat sighs.  
“One year,” Wanda nods and smiles at her friends.  
“I know,” Sam huffs.  
“Who won the bet?” Clint asks and looks around on his friends.  
“Nobody had guessed on this month,” Bucky shrugged.  
“I had,” Sam smirks.  
“I did too,” Morgan says and smiles big. “What did we win?” Tony chuckles.  
“You get to decide what we are going to watch next movie night and a lot of candy,” Pepper smiles at her daughter. Sam looks at Morgan and shrugs.  
“And maybe I can name their firstborn child,” Morgan smirks and looks at Steve and Y/N.  
“We can decide together,” Sam smiles at Morgan who nods.  
“This is a happy start to the new year,” Morgan cheers as Tony starts the countdown.

THE END  
(or is it... I might do an Epilogue) ;)


End file.
